The Year of Standing In The Storm & God’s Grace

lost-in-the-storm

The scripture the Lord gave me  January 1st 2015 was Isaiah 43:19 See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. Oh how I was looking forward to 2015 year as taking new ground, promises coming to past and growing even more intimacy with the Lord. A friend of mine had also called me ending of 2014 to prophetically speak into my life as to what the Lord revealed would take place in 2015. He stated that the Holy Spirit was in dwelling in me, that 2015 would be a very uncomfortable year. Then friends would distance themselves from you but I shouldn’t lose heart because God would bring that back. He also stated that the Lord had anointed me and many would come to know him through me. Boy do I tell you now remember those words. This has been one of the most  uncomfortable years for me for sure.  Where do I begin, what do u do when your side swiped with  relentless attacks and you find your self in a middle of storm? Well as the word says when you have done all that you can do, stand….Lets be honest its easier said then done right lol. Upon surrendering my life to the call of God last year it has been eye opening, exciting, amazing and awesome. One of the many righteous prayers I said to the Lord is that ” Jesus I will suffer for you, whatever it looks like, whatever may come I am running after you”. Boy, I have come to know not only does Jesus hold to his word but he will hold you at your words too. So I knew trials would come, in fact my whole life has been full of them however, I thought now that I am walking in the ways of the Lord the trials wouldn’t be as hard  right ..or (maybe out of pride) I wouldn’t  really have as many trials or be phased by them because I live for the Lord now (duntadda -superhero anthem music lol) Unfortunately, I think in the past 4 months I have cried more than I have in my life time, sad I know but true I know have a deeper understanding of

Matthew 7: 13-14 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 Because narrow is the gate and DIFFICULT is the way which leads to life and there are few who find it

I was so excited when I finally moved knowing that God called me out, setting me apart for greater intimacy with him right!? I mean I even had my own prayer closet! Yes! of course but I didn’t realize It would be a season of great testing as well. In surrendering to the Lord  in excitement I realize he has given me the gift of dreams and vision. As I sought the Lord and asking him what his will was for me in this season and finally after waiting. He told me it was time to move get my own place and start a fellowship at my house,  youtube channel and a blog about all that he was teaching and sharing with me

DISCOURAGMENT- attack on your faithfulness
LESSON LEARNED-God is not concerned with numbers neither should I

The Lord had spoken to me told me to began a fellowship at my house, a prayer meeting at my job. In excitement I told my HR manager which is a great friend and we began holding meeting at the job. Initially no one was showing up then their would be times of 5 people coming then other weeks of one or two or none. The same with the fellowship at my house. I was so excited to have Christian friendships and fellowship. However it seemed people weren’t coming. One  of the days one person confirmed and i decided  to cancel and the Holy Spirit gave me the scripture “For where two or three are gathered together unto My name, there am I in their midst Matthew 18:20 I soon repented and the Lord reminded me that I always leave the 99 for 1 remember that. On another day no one showed up and the enemy was just throwing all sorts of thoughts and lies my way. I just wanted to give up thinking if I had heard the lord correctly and he spoke to me during worshiping saying “Didn’t you say you wanted me, am I truly enough for you. If no one ever came would you continue being faithful”

SPIRITAL WARFARE-attack on ones faith

He reveals a lot in my dreams and  I was really never taught on spiritual warfare even now its not talked or taught a lot in the churches.  So I began to have a lot of spiritual warfare dreams, fighting witches, demons, attempting to  cast them out of people and not sure who to talk too or what they meant. So the Lord let me to John Paul Jackson stream ministries and I have begun to have great understanding as to what I was seeing and what the Lord was revealing.

I  had a dream where I was so excited to follow the Lord an officer stopped me turning in a demon to mock me as to how I wanted to follow the lord. Immediately upon waking up the Holy Spirit showed me vision of myself walking around my room praying intensely. I was startled and of course got my bible and holy spirit opened it  to Psalm 91 as I began to pray  intensely. The most intense of the attacks started in October where I had a I woke up from another dream just to be held down in a form of “sleep paralysis” (which is another form of demonic oppression) and I heard a wirl whind of voices yelling at me to stop talking to everyone then was released. I immediately drop to my knees in my bedroom and began to pray. The scripture the Holy Spirit gave me was Romans 12:12 Rejoice in Hope, Endure in Suffering and persist in prayer. Boy did he mean that. This attack lasted for 2 months. I began to feel so uneasy in my house like  evil presence was there. I couldn’t sleep there alone if I did sleep there all  . I would pray, anoint the house but would still have restless nights and attacks. Soon I started to believe the lies of the enemy that I had done something wrong, that there was no point in praying . Worse of all I had people remove themselves from me because of the attacks. I was honestly losing hope kept asking the Lord why. Then the Holy Spirit gave me another scripture

1 peter 4:12-1

Suffering for Being a Christian

12 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.

I finally went to get prayer at my church and upon a lady laying hands she stated to me a harassing spirit had been assigned to me. Not because of what I had done or my weakness but because of my strength and calling on my life. Needless to say I broke down in tears those where the most comforting word I had heard in a while. Then the holy spirit prompted me to fast for 4 days straight and received revelation in a dream of me casting out the spirit of fear from my house and then casting out the strong man! I was gracious for the Lords faithfulness.

Through the intense trials the remaining half of the year relationships broke apart, began to compare myself to others and even began to have jealously, resentment, discouragement and insecurity in my heart. Which exactly what the  enemy wanted me to give up on God, return back to my old ways and lose faith in his promises. But oh for the Grace of GOD which held me, sustained me, and carried me throughout the year to not give up. I have been strengthen and have a deeper trust in JESUS. I now know that our relationship, worship and praise to God is not based on what we feel or what we are going  through but it should be always based  on who he is.  A GOOD GOOD FATHER!

May Gods grace, peace & joy be with you this new year 2016. GOD BLESS YOU!