Brother David’s Testimony- How the Lord made A Priest Out Of Me

Testimony – How the Lord made a Priest out of  me? by Brother David of the Annunciation Franciscan Oblates of Mt. Carmel ; Sacred Heart Refuge Sangre de Cristo Mountains, New Mexico March 17, 2021 I dedicate this testimony to Mother Mary and Father Joseph, who have walked with me the whole way. 

Hi Heartdwellers, so I am not a cradle Catholic. I never knew what a priest was growing up ; I barely knew who Jesus was. I had heard of the Name. I did go to a Christian camp for two summers near Yosemite Valley and during one stay I had lost my inhaler; yet somehow never needed it for those two weeks. Several events in my life didn’t make sense until I could understand that God was operating miracles to awaken me to Truth.  For the couple of years that our family did attend services at a Presbyterian church in Los Angeles, I only understood church as the place where my Sunday School class made lunch for the elderly, and the role of Joseph in ‘Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat’ was given to a girl.  I went on a mission trip to Tijuana my senior year only because I had a crush on a girl who had signed up to go. I ate a burrito on the way back to Los Angeles and had violent food poisoning. 

The poison of lust was already in me. God was not present in our family; we were our own clan, very sheltered, and I was an extremely naive 18-year old when my parents sent me off to college on the east coast, very confident their firstborn son was on his way. An impressive job, magazine home, solid retirement portfolio, gourmet food and nice vacations were to be the measure of success for my life. Little did my parents know they were letting me loose in a playground of heathen foolishness. I had already displayed some unruly behavior as a kid growing up – petty theft, pathological lying, risk taking to impress friends and girls, ditching school. Minor offenses, you might say. But nothing was able to check my conscience enough to override an insatiable need for attention, peer approval and getting the girl. My parents are hard-working, faithfully married Americans who did everything to provide for their kids. But once I was given adult freedom, I pursued reckless and aimless ambitions in my 20s and 30s with such stupendous consequences ; sin was my compass. 

Does God look at that and say to Himself, well, I told them My foolishness is wiser, so, this guy would make a great priest ! If you had the patience to hear more details of my life before meeting Jesus, you would decide that I was the worst candidate for priesthood. I can say that the only thing that made me change my ways – was the constant pain and sickness that the poison of sin had injected into me. And I had a high tolerance for pain and suffering, growing up with severe and debilitating asthma and allergies. When life became too difficult I never reasoned that it was sin, but simply because I was just messed up, and that life was painful, and there was nothing you could do about it. I would simply pursue some other avenue of sin in the hopes that this new remedy would work.It never once occurred to me growing up what I wanted to do, and I suffered as a wandering spirit my whole life until knowing the Lord. My parents, very driven to provide their children with the best education, suggested what they knew each time I came back home, lost and confused, and this always involved more school. 

My young adult life spinned around in a cycle of academics, quitting jobs, and moving back home. By the time I was 30 I already had two masters degrees. TWO. In the last effort to find that career path so necessary to launch me into success, I put myself through night school to earn a Masters in Accountancy, then studied like a mad man to pass the very difficult CPA exams, and then spent a year with an audit firm to validate the license. 3 – years – of – torture. When I began the night classes at San Diego State University to earn the Masters in Accounting, the anxiety in me began to take on demonic proportions. I started to have horrific nightmares and began to see a dark shadow in my room at night. I would throw my pillow at it. I didn’t realize until much later that someone was astral projecting into my room and throwing curses at me. I wonder how many doors I had opened to give the enemy permission to torment me. I already regretted this new career choice but told myself there was no turning back. 

There was a point in all that mess where I ended up crying out to God, crumpled down on the floor in the middle of the night, asking, God if you’re there, if You’re real, please…help. I lifted my hands up to Heaven, this was my last attempt, the only hope left I found at rock bottom. I cried out everything left in me, I turned numb. And then, I heard His Voice. Not a still small voice, but a strong voice, audible, yet somehow that made no noise and that only I could hear. That moment convinced me of God, and after a year of looking for that accounting job in the 2009 economic crash, I finally received a job offer in France, with the #1 audit firmÉ.the same in which my Dad had become an invested partner, where he spent his whole career and became extremely successful. So I moved back abroad to France for the 3rd time in my life, in June of 2010. And the misery continued.

 In many ways the deception of the enemy grew even thicker, in that span of time between finding God and finding Jesus. But signs along the way and divine coincidences also began to occur that were a beacon of light compelling me forward. Predictable as it was, I got fired from that audit job after a year, and went to work in a Japanese restaurant in Paris. I would end up trying to start my own business a couple of years later in the food industry. These years were the most difficult – I saw everything come to the surface ; it was like all the darkness, lies, new age deception, godlessness and selfish, sinful pride manifested in a very real way, and I was fighting for dear life to wake up. A living nightmare if you will. It was horrific. Ironically, my business partner would be the first person to hand me the Gospel – the mystic Gospel of Jesus according to Maria Valtorta. I had also begun to watch accounts of near death experiences on the internet. The summer of 2015 was decisive – one morning while at the farmer’s market selling our product, began rounds of vomiting. I returned home later and couldn’t move ; I was on the floor in a fetal position, and sadness and grief welled up in me. 

This time, I cried out to Jesus – please Jesus, please come be with me, I need You, I need to be in Your Presence, I can’t do this alone. And the next day, He showed up as I discovered the Heart Dwellers channel, where I learned you could have an intimate relationship, conversation, and fellowship with Jesus, see Him, hear Him, and talk with Him. Jesus didn’t show up in my room that day in a physical manner, but Holy Spirit arrived with the tools I would need to learn how to always see the Lord, instead of hoping for a rare visitation or open vision. Oh my.. for months on end I cried. And thus began the process of deliverance, which is ongoing to this day, from all worldliness, sinful habits, unhealthy attachments, and misleading ways. At that time in life, I was about to sign an irrevocable 9-year lease for a storefront in France, and was to be soon engaged. The Lord appeared in a dream in which I was in the jewelry shop with my fiance picking out a ring. I turn to look out through the large display window to the street, and see Jesus standing outside. His puts His hands up around His eyes to peer in – He sees me there, and, crestfallen, walks away in sadness. I woke up right away to the grief and realization of His feelings. I felt like I was punched in the heart. It wasn’t easy, and it certainly wasn’t pretty, but I quit both relationships with my good friend / business partner, and girlfriend / fiancé. God had other plans for my life. 

One upside to living in the valley of death for so long is that once Jesus is Your Savior, you know it’s not the ‘new and improved me’ that you are living, but HIS life that has been given to you for free, totally undeserved, to live in for all eternity. I hear the Father talk to me sometimes, and I realize, He’s not talking about me but to His Son living in me. There’s just no room for smug pretense. God and I both know, life is not something I’m very good at. And He’s going to save my whole family of 2 parents, 2 brothers and 2 sisters because the black sheep of them all who was hand-picked by God – would never boast of being a Christian. ÒI peeled him off the floor and put a ring on his finger, and he will never forget that for the rest of his life, God would explain to you. But God didn’t just welcome me Home as the prodigal son that I am. When Jesus entered into life, or I entered into His, or we entered into Our Life, He gave me far-out promises, like becoming a priest. I didn’t know what that meant when He told me, but 5 years later, here I am, offering the Holy Sacrifice of Mass and going, how did I get here? It was a specific moment of sitting with the Lord, (thank you Heart Dwellers for teaching me), when He unveiled the calling on my life. 

The next five years were a maze of discernment weekends with religious orders, conversations with priests, monks, nuns and missionaries, and year-long service programs where I volunteered at Catholic churches. The first of such was under the auspices of the OFM Franciscans at St. Camillus parish, outside of DC. The second, with Our Lady of Hope in Philadelphia, through Catholic Social Services. At the end of 5 years of searching, I knew a great deal more about the differences between Benedictines, Franciscans, Dominicans, and diocesan priests, but I was more lost than when I had started. So much that I even gave up becoming a priest. I started packing my bags for Japan to be a missionary there. I had even bought my plane ticket. Funny thing along the way of getting lost – it’s where you and God meet. And this is where the story of my heavenly parents must be told to explain how I got here, to priesthood, in a religious order, doing the artwork I had also been called to do. It all fell into my lap, but let’s go back a few years. 

As I already mention, after I had given my life to Jesus, or rather, begged Him to come to earth to visit me, I was immediately led to the Heart Dwellers ministry, the next day. Clare’s messages at that time taught the Divine Mercy chaplet. I tell you what, when you’re at rock bottom and you’ve just cried out to Jesus to be saved, hearing about the Divine Mercy revelation was like seeing the Coast Guard pull up next to my shipwreck as I’m in the freezing, shark-infested waters, about to sink down. I started praying those chaplets like they were the ladder into the ship. I remember, literally, I would race to say as many as I could in the Divine Mercy hour. I was soon airlifted out of France where I was living at the time, in quite miraculous fashion, and brought back to America in a state of shell-shock. A providential friendship at a soup kitchen led me to attend worship services at a Presbyterian church. But the Divine Mercy devotion still kept shouting in my ear, “YOU NEED AN ABSOLUTION, YOU MISERABLE WRETCH, and so when the next Divine Mercy Sunday rolled around I went to a priest at St. Gabriel’s down the street. It took me several gut-wrenching days to prepare my confession and then, to my great dismay, was told I needed to become Roman Catholic to enter the confessional. Which I did. 

I was confirmed the following year in the Roman Catholic church at St. Patrick’s in Charlotte, NC. On Divine Mercy Sunday. Funny, today as I write this testimony we are celebrating the feast day of St. Patrick. Maybe he interceded to kick my rear hard enough to finally sit down and write this. The wonderful parish secretary there handed me a book, 33 Days to Morning Glory. Written by Fr. Gaitley of the Marian Priests of the Immaculate Conception, it summarizes the various consecration programs of 4 great saints, to prepare for total surrender of oneself to Jesus through Mary. I did, and from that point on I saw Mary grab hold of my hand and begin walking home with me. I consecrated myself to Mary on the feast of Her Immaculate Heart. She determined that of the 3 cities where I could have served with the OFM Franciscans, it would be in DC, because the Basilica of the Immaculate Conception is there, the national Shrine of the Catholic Church in America. Many Masses, confessions and hours of prayer spent there. 

After a year of service She then guided me to serve at Our Lady of Hope in Philadelphia. And when a car parked in front of the parish one day with the license plate, ‘Exodus’, I realized I was in the wrong place and knew I was supposed to be somewhere else. After a few last ditch, half-hearted attempts to become a priest, I had given up on that calling and figured, as aforementioned, that I would be a missionary to Japan. Little did I know God was literally going to allow a plague to descend upon my Egypt and guide me through the waters to the Promised Land of priesthood and religious life. While I was at Our Lady of Hope, I dedicated my Lent to St. Joseph and decided I would renew my consecration to him. Yes, after consecrating myself to Mary I wasted no time in doing the same with St. Joseph. At the time, I had been following a class by Kevin Zadai, online, in which he suddenly says, you will discover God’s destiny for your life this weekend. And guess what? I did. I heard from Clare that very Sunday. Palm Sunday in fact. Inviting me out to New Mexico to join a prayer community, sold out to Jesus. I said yes. In the midst of a global epidemic…surreal. 

The last vestiges of worldliness and attachments resisted, but I could see through the smoke and mirrors now, and knew I was being extended an incredible invitation to follow Him. And when I arrived, unbeknownst to me, was a community of priests to welcome me. The Franciscan Oblates of Mt. Carmel. That summer I was invited to profess my vows as a 3rd order Franciscan and a priest. It was suggested that I do so on the next Marian feast day – this was agreed to. What was that particular feast day, you might ask? – the Immaculate Heart of Mary. Mary and Joseph turned me into the priest God had decided to make of me, revealing the Divine Orchestration of Holy Spirit that makes me marvel each time I think about it. When I was lost, Jesus found me. When I lost my vocation, I was given it. God works in such mysterious and then surprising ways. And it’s a family affair. And I didn’t have to go to seven years of seminary! Phew. 

If I have this podium to share with you God’s Love and Divine Will, please let me bless with you this : God is bringing His Bride back to the garden, restoring His Church to the beginning. Nothing could be simpler and truer than living one’s vocation under the parental roof of Mary and Joseph. Nazareth is Heaven on earth. And the Holy Family is the safe refuge for all walks of life, not just priests. Recently, God reminded me of the promises He had given to me 5 years earlier, and that they had all come true. Now, He said, it’s time to graduate, to kindergarten.I understood – our vocations are not who we are, but what He does, and what He loves most about us is that we are simply His little, very needy children. One thing hasn’t changed since receiving the vocation of priesthood. My insatiable need for love and approval. It has only grown bigger, a huge chasm, that at times is agonizing. I used to be sin-sick. Now, I’m homesick. I long, I cry, for the Fatherland. I must confess, the first years as a Christian were not easy for me.

 I never could fully trust in God’s Mercy, even though He says, via St. Faustina, that the greatest sinner has the greatest right to My Mercy. I know that’s true – because I see what God did to restore me. Intellectually I understood what was happening.  Scripturally, it was all lining up.  This is God Who loves me. But my heart couldn’t come to peace with His terms of contract. This is free, and forever? But then, the companion I had always been hoping for showed up. Her name is Mary. 

It is through Her motherly love and heavenly intercession, both of which are very real, and very available to everyone, that I found the relief in my heart and the ability to trust in Jesus  through Her. I don’t have the guts to go to Him directly. I’m no saint.  I’m a momma’s boy. Always have been, and always will be. I will not expound upon theological tenets or provide further miracles to convince you. All I will say to you is that God took a dead man, put him in the arms of Mary, and turned that pig-pen sinner into a priest. That should be enough to pique your interest, and from there, if you want to learn more about Her, Mary will reveal how much She loves you. And yes, I capitalize She, because She is My Queen. My Mother is the Queen of Heaven. I boast in that. I hope you will too. May the Holy Family of Nazareth keep you, watch over you, guide you, and bless you. And praise! the Lord God, Our Father, Our Savior, bless Him! for His immeasurable Love and Mercy. Amen 

My Guardian Angel’s Message To The Daughters of god

Hello brothers and sister and Heartdwellers Family. May you all be blessed.

I was in prayer before the Lord and speaking in tounges I then heard a faint male voice say “ You are a highly favored daughter of God” in my heart I knew it wasn’t Jesus, Papa or Holy Spirit. Immediately I sensed in my heart that Jesus was allowing my guardian angel to speak to me.

Could it be Zeal I thought?

I found out his name two years ago during prayer when I longed to really know my guardian angel and I was then becoming keenly aware of his presence. There were many times in prayer or just when I was out with people I would hear flutter of wings in my ear. The first time in startled me and as it happened more often I realized it was the brush of angel wings I was hearing. I have also shared with you all, that when your ears pop and your not at a high altitude the atmosphere has changed and the Holy Angels are making their presence known.

Since then I have invited Zeal everywhere, always asking for his help especially when I have a task before me that requires physical strength, I ask him for his help. He has helped me chop wood, prayed for me, and helped me pray for others as well. I love him because I know he has protected and defended me so much and taken many blows for me. So I always talk to him as if he is there with me at times through out the day. However, I have never heard from him and I longed in my heart to know him better. As I told Jesus just a while ago I would love to see Zeal, I would love to know him better especially since he has been my life time companion.

The Lord answered the first prayer about a month ago. During prayer I had a vision where I saw Zeal here on the mountain right next to my hermitage outside. He was were I usually cut the wood and he was standing there looking very timid and shy.  His wings were not  extended but down and his hands were placed together in front of him as he was looking down and looked up shy at me. He had brown armor on with red cloak or hood over it and he had long slightly wavy blonde hair some was tucked behind his ears but when he looked up at me one side of his hair fell towards his face. The most distinctive feature was his eyes. They were piercing, there were really big almond eyes that were so beautiful and his smile was radiant yet still timid. He very tall, strong, with very cut physique. He was gorgeous, if I can say that about my Guardian Angel. It was though he shared the nature of God in his meekness, but I knew He was powerful and very strong.

I went to the BP to get confirmation, So I went outside to write and Jesus began speaking,

“My beloved I am here and have desired for your companion and Guardian Angel Zeal to speak with you. Have you not desired that for a long time?”

I responded, Yes I have Lord I truly have 

Jesus responded,

Well here is you’re answered prayer, for he has desired to speak with you for a while now as well. You have been led and prompted by him in many things although you did not know and I had to ensure our frequency would be clear before he would be brought before you or you would doubt again and disregard his voice.”

Thank you Lord because I felt fear and anxiety gripping in my chest at first, but now I feel at peace and so much ease. 

Jesus continued,

“It’s important you and Mother Elizabeth pray over your room every morning. There have been man y assignments against you two, anything that you been sensing or feeling tell it to get out. Pray together in the morning conquering this, once you get up. Your prayers together are powerful and do much damage.”

Okay Lord

Then Guardian Angel Zeal began,

“My beloved friend, you are a highly favored one of the Father. You have been assailed with much lies and guilt your whole life that many of your patterns and thinking have been formed by this world and not at all how the Father sees you”.

I said Zeal, I cant believe its you speaking

 Zeal responded,

“I am always with you, speaking to you in various ways. The good Lord told you that you would be introduced to more of your heavenly family, we so yearn to talk with you all even if just for a moment and what a grace it is when the Lord removes the veil, but a moment so we can touch in with you.

As an aside what he said here is true. On Sunday I pulled a rhema that said “I will began to introduce to you more and more of your family, the saints, angels, your heavenly family.”

I have come to give a message of encouragement to the daughters of God and to you my dear little friend. I have been with you since the day you were birthed from your mothers womb. I stood next to her side to ensure your protection and her smooth delivery. Each soul is assigned a guardian angel, we not only guard and protect you for all your life, but we desire to be your companions as well, but so very few souls are aware of our presence. Many see us as mystical beings, distance, far off and evasive, but that is not at all true. Although the good Lord is your true friend and companion in this life He has given us to you, to be with the souls on earth very physically. “

You mean spiritually? I said

Zeal responded,

No my little friend, I mean physically. Because we are heavenly beings we are able to pass through the first, second and third Heaven with ease, but I am very physically present with you just as I am spiritually. We are not confined to one space in Heaven only the demons and the fallen angels are, but I can be before the throne of God the Father, worshiping him, in the presence of my Magnificent Creator than simutanseouly be at your side when you are in need of me or when you call. We Angels always have the the Lords glory before us and within us. The Kingdom of Heaven is within us just as much as we are apart of the kingdom. We merely have to close our eyes and contemplate His Goodness and we are there before His throne doesn’t matter where we are physically. You too can do that little one, God desires to make Heaven very real for you and so many souls in this time. Although you live in a darkened world you will walk, live and talk as though you live in the atmosphere of Heaven. 

Zeal may I ask you a question?  I know it’s silly, but why do some souls have more than one angel escorting them to heaven and I wanted to know the souls who end up going to hell are their guardian angels grieved?

Zeal responded,

“Yes my little friend, we are created from the Fathers heart although were are not made in his image, we have emotions, feelings jus as he does, but are emotions and feelings are not selfish or in self love like humans. Our perspective and emotions are heavenly bound. Oh how a guardian angel grieves over a soul that is lost to darkness. Just as the Father grieves. We don’t see you as our children, but as friends and would you not grieve if a life long companion you have tried to save ends up being lost in perdition?

Yes I would 

And so do we. Human souls are so dear to us my little friend. Out of all the Angelic choirs, task and jobs an Angel can be assigned too, the greatest is that of being assigned to a soul. That is the greatest honor and privilege before God and all of Heaven because you were created in His image. Many Angels are assigned to families and lineages,

so we know one another very well and communicate with one another, constantly to ensure the well being of souls in families.”

As an aside here he was answering me why some souls have more than one angel escorting them before the throne of God when they die. I heard that once in a testimony and interested me to know why some have more than one Guardian Angel.

 Zeal continued,

“We are also able to pray for you and pray with you. Many don’t communicate with us or ask for our help as often as they should. It was I that reminded you to put on your armor first thing in bed. I stand at your bed side in defense with other angels to protect you as you sleep. It is during sleep when most of the battles happen for souls. So much happens in the spirit, if only souls could understand the importance of praying and covering themselves before they sleep. You have been doing that and that is good.  When you are feeling tired or weary I am right there to aid and assist you. Ask me to pray when you cannot and ask me to always suit you up in the morning and at night before you sleep. I am your faithful friend, invite me to pray along side you and I will pray the will of God over you and things you cannot perceive that need your covering.

Daughters of God I come to encourage you today to arise. You are the highly favored ones of the Queen of Heaven. Chosen for this time and this generation to see the greatest demonstration of the Lord mercy and His power. Many of you have been assaulted with words of defamation, discouragement and guilt to make you unsure of the task you have been called too. This is the hour for many of the Daughters of God to lead many into the Kingdom of God through your gifts and ministries He has destined for each of you. The sons of Adam will be behind you in this season and the supportive role of prayer to see great things the Lord will do through His daughters. 

You must pray for perseverance and fortitude for everything will continue to come against your calling. You are an army of soldiers entrusted to the Queen of Heaven and led by Her intercession. Just as satan has violently come against Her character, Her role and Her nature in the Church he will use the same attacks upon you. To detour you from leading and shepherding the flock God has given you. For some it may be children at home, for others it may be souls the Lord has entrusted to you. 

It is time to fight and don’t get weary in this battle. Your Guardian Angels are around to support, aid, assist and be your companions. Ask your Guardian Angels to help you with your children, help you with the souls God has entrusted to you. When you can’t get through communicating to them ask your Guardian Angel to speak with the Guardian Angle of your loved ones, of your children and of the souls you’re trying to get through too. You can give your Guardian Angels prayers, swords and armor to be given to your loved ones and they will do it. Not just with spiritual things, but even with minimal task. Ask us to help you with your children, to cook, clean, to help you work on your gifts. You will be amazed how efficient you become and how the things you need at the very moment will be easy to find in order that you accomplish the task at hand. Ask us, for we are not just your Guardian Angels, Companions, but your servants and we love to serve souls that do the will of God. We rush to your side to aide you. That is all for now my beloved little friend. I stand at your side always to aid you, to comfort you , to protect you and to encourage you.”

That was the end of My Guardian Angel message

I do want to write a disclaimer here for those who may be new to the channel and leery about me getting a message from an Angel. This wouldn’t be the first time and we must remember where Jesus is all of heaven is. However, Satan does come appearing as an angel of light and we have many people who speaks to beings and angels but are not in Christ that is a demon or familiar spirit. It is important that everything you hear and see is discerned and lines up with scripture. I have done many teachings on discernment and have discerned this message that is comes from the spirit of the living God. I encourage those who are desiring to go much deeper with the Lord intimacy to not fear hearing or seeing your Guardian Angel or even one of the saints in Heaven. They are all alive, very real and truly desire to speak with us to give us heavenly counsel and instructions in these last days that we may all preserver through the difficult trials we have up ahead. 

God bless you all until the next message 

Intimacy with God: “Your Always On My Mind”

“Your Always on My Mind, Am I On Yours?”

Hey family,

The Lord really wanted to have me continue to teach on intimacy with him  being in love with God. So in this series will be speaking on “Purity” because when you are in love with someone they are always on your mind right? In the morning you wake up your thinking of them, even dreaming of them, when you go to sleep they are on your mind lol. So is the same with God, when you are in love with him he is always on your mind. You see him in everything and everyone and that began with purity. A Pure bride is irroestiable to God, a  pure souls draws for the Holy Trinity to itself and becomes a temple for the Holy Spirit to dwell, For Jesus to rest and live and for the Father to make is throne.

For scripture says “The Pure in heart shall see God” so guys it very possible to see God with the eyes of your heart for that is where he dwells. That is where the kingdom of God is, it is within you but you must come before him in purity.  So how does one become pure you may ask? It is a work of God the more you spend time with him in his presence the more you become like him, the more you love him, the more you want what he wants because you know he is good and anything he ask of you or takes from you is for your good. So one step builds on another. The demons hate purity guys and have defiled it since the beginning so they will give  you thoughts and images that are not from the Lord you must discern. If they can’t get you to fear Gods presence then they will get you to have impure motives in all you do. You will began to seek Jesus for what you can get, seek him for your own desires and plans and do things out of self will rather than in the will of God.

So practically coming before the Lord when you spend time with you may have a lot of things on your mind and the devils are clever to bring up distractions. So get a peace of paper and write down your to do list, or all the things that are on our heart. Write them down and leave them there on that paper. That literally will clear your mind so you can enter into the Lords presence empty so that he can fill your mind. Then also lay all your concerns at his feet very literally you can then tell him your desires, your opinions about certain things that concern you than simply tell him you want what he wants. Whatever his plan is for those things you are willing to be made willing/ That is a powerful prayer because one thing the Lord gave himself no control over is your will. It is your will that the devils want and the Lord also desires. So when you surrender your will to the Lord than you can come before him in purity because he knows he can do whatever he desires because you want his will.

So simply say everyday “Lord make me willing to be made willing” in that he releases graces with the areas of self will your struggling with than turn your heart towards him so that you are willing for whatever answer he gives you.

As I have referenced before listen to the songs he plays over you …not just in your time alone but all day guys. He speaking all day to you. Listen carefully for the lyrics many times there is direction he is giving you and even in love songs he plays in stores or even at the bank its him singing over you. One time before I took my vows as a Franciscan when I was back home. I walked into the bank and the song was playing “Will you marry me” by ..I was flushed because I knew it was Jesus speaking to me lol I couldn’t help but laugh and smile as I told him “yes” but had no idea what that would entail. So when your mind is on him you see him in everything, in a butterfly the flutters by, in a warm smile from someone passing you buy, in the compliment someone gave you, in the heart shaped piece of toast or milk spill, or in a wet floor “caution sign” at Chipotle when your suppose to be fasting lol He does give warnings too and all of these things have happened to me. Indeed his is so very present all day  lol 

It’s important to “Seek Jesus for Who He is” as he has told me before “Seek me for me”. Ouch that let’s me know my motives are coming impure as I am coming before him to either get a word or direction from him rather than just being with him, My bridegroom that I love. Trust also must come with Purity as he has told me before as well “ You seek me but you don’t trust me so that is why you go off on your own”. So you can seek him but if we don’t trust his direction, his council then what is the point because you will continue on in self will and impure motives. Wanting to work out things, situations, circumstances and people on your own rather than doing it Gods way. That what he calls attachments and far too many of us are so attached to sooooo many things. As he has given me the rhema before “Detach detach your emotions are getting in the way” Oh boy I know a thing or two about that lol. He wants us completely detached from the things of the earth, outcomes and from creatures as well. To be only attached to him, his way and his will when we seek him.

You see Jesus not only wants your life, your heart but he wants your will. If you would trust him and surrender completely to all that he wants, all that he gives, all that he takes away because he has your best interest at heart and it is always the best outcome even thought many times we won’t understand. So you must trust him.

Remember, this is your bridegroom, he loves you, desires you, needs you and want to do life with you. So think of him when you wake up ask him what he wants to do with your day together. So you don’t get caught up in fruitless activities of the world that lead no where.  Think of him as you both are  working together, Think of him even when you have others around you, that he is right there in your midst what are you thinking? What are you saying or doing is it pleasing to your beloved bridegroom?, Think of him when you are going to sleep? What did you guys do to day? What consolations did he give you to show he was there with you? How did he speak through others today to show you his love? Think of him, leave him always on your mind.

My Beloved spouse do you have anything to add Lord

Jesus began,

“Oh my dear ones how I long for you with a longing you cannot comprehend only in eternity will you realize how I have labored for your love and the anguish of my soul to continue to wait when we can finally be together not as through a thin veil but face to face. I tell you that you can experience that even now in the secret garden of your heart I am invit

ing all my brides to join me there this week. Yes right now it may be the garden of gethsemane where I toiled in anguish over the cross set before me but how I was rejoiced over you because you  were worth it. Every bit of it, How I would do it all over again a million times over just to have you right next to my side beloved one. you are always on my mind do you know there is not once second that goes by that I am not thinking of you

I am known as the constant one and you are constantly on the mind of your God. As you sleep, when you awake as you go about your day I gush over you and oh but when you give me a grace or better even when you give me your time I am so excited, elated with joy that my beloved has chosen me from the other options that have pervaded her. she would rather spend time with me. You have no idea how that satisfies my thirst and longing for love. Yes I desire to be loved, I longed to be loved I need to be loved by you my beloved one. Oh please do come, come and allow to wash you clean allow me to heal the wounds of your heart and restore your peace and joy. Please come I am waiting even now. Allow me to cleans your mind and heart from all unrighteousness. Put my cloak of righteousness upon you and call you my pure irresistible bride who wants me and me alone. Come You are always on my mind.

 I think of what I created, I think of what I have birthed, I think of what I have in store for you beloved and I am in awe when you say yes , when you respond to my advances. how so few  respond or even tarry. please don’t disappoint me come. How I think of what you like, I set your day up not only with lessons but with great love notes all around you. Yes I too get excited in planned these thing, you know I have all eternity to do so.  (smiling) Yes ,I know you love birds the yellows specially so I planned at that very moment when you sat on the bench the yellow bird to be there to tell you I love you. I think of how you love those gourmet cookies so I make sure even when the store my be running low on stock I ensure that one package is left just for you because those are your favorite. I think of you as I set the moon at just the right angle to hit your window casting off the shadow filling your room with moonlight just to make you smile. Yes, I think of you. 

I know your favorite color is red so I make sure that the dress you love so much, the red one sits waiting for you to pick up. Just to see your joy as you put it on. Yes, I think of you, as I have butterflies flutter all around and about you even on the highways to let you know I am very present with you. Yes I think of you, I have your child come and run giving you a kiss and a hug for no apparent reason because that sweet hug and kiss was from me beloved to tell you how much I love you. Yes I think of you, as I leave a rose at the end of your steps on valentines day just to show you my love. Yes, I think of you, when I know you are seeking me for answers and unsure about what I have told you and when you get on the computer the answer in in the message you read, the book you pick up or a sign on a billboard. Yes, I planned all of these things before eternities time. My footprints, my love letters to my bride through out the day. You are indeed always on my mind beloved am I on yours? 

That was the end of Jesus message

Intimacy With God: “I Miss My Time With You”

“I miss my time with you”

Hello Family,

I woke up this morning, thinking of the Lord, asking what was on his heart and I looked across my bed on the wall were remnants of dirt from the guys building the house, but as I looked more closely it seemed to form an image of Jesus. It looked like he was walking on the shores, but alone. I was seeing his back. It was like the picture Mother Clare used on the message “Togetherness” but his bride wasn’t there. He seemed so sad. All these feelings came in my heart as I felt his grief yet again. Sure enough before doing the Lord’s supper, I just felt led to get a reading from Mornings with Saint Therese and it said;

Console Jesus: “The trials of Jesus, what a mystery! He has trials then, He too? Yes, He has them, and often He is alone. He looks for consolers and can find none. He has trials. Many serve Jesus when He is consoling them, but few consent to keep company with Jesus sleeping on the waves or suffering in the garden of agony?”

So I knew my beloved Jesus was hurting and had asked me to do a teaching on intimacy. I came before the Lord saying: “Lord I feel this ties in with you desiring your brides to spend time with you and you feel alone.”

Jesus is there anything you would like to add?

Jesus began,

“My beloved, how my heart aches and longs for my beloved. But she runs off to the world merely seeing me as a decision, a short prayer, the scripture of the day. But I am much, much more. Yes, I am your God but I have also made myself to be your friend, bridegroom and I am a man who has needs. I long for your attention, how I need your love and devotion.

Yes, I need you. Your God needs you. You are a masterpiece that fits perfectly to me, nothing else will satisfy.

Fear and Condemnation keep you from me, but may I tell you they are tools of the enemy to keep my beloved spouse away from me. I know all things yet I love you! Please, no longer allow shame to keep you from me. The same tool that was used with Adam & Eve. How it broke me to pieces to see them run away, in fear, in hiding from me, (Jesus was crying and I too was in tears, feeling his heart that moment he called for them but they ran instead)… their God, their Father, their friend, their healer and restorer. Only if they would’ve come, acknowledged their error, how I was ready to forgive and retire them but yet they feared me instead and continued to blame each other.

My beloved ones, fear and shame have stolen years away from me. I created you for myself, do you understand that? That means I know every crack, every weakness, I know your form because I created you yet I love you dearly and desire you next to me. I no longer want quick morning routines to get me out of the way but, I desire to do life with you and spend all my time with you. Would you ask me to help you with breakfast? With the kids? Help you with work? Go on walks together, runs to the grocery store, they are most fun when I do it with you! I love to be included in every aspect of your life, yes even the difficult and ugly areas as you would say. Don’t shy away from me or push me away. Invite me to these areas, invite me in these occasions, invite me into your whole day and you will see how I make my presence known to you. You will see how much more peace and resolve you feel at the end of your day when we do life together.”

Afterwards, as I was praying the rosary, all these images and emotions where flooding me as I prayed the Sorrowful Mystery, since it was Tuesday. I saw Jesus on the cross just like in the images of The Passion. As I prayed the third mystery I saw Jesus now being beaten by the Roman soldiers, making fun of him. Then he being tied up in the dungeon underground awaiting his walk to calvary. I saw blessed Mother in tears bending down right where Jesus was hanging and I was right next to her with my ears to the ground as he was beaten and downcast in the dungeon.

Then I saw vision of him circled by a mob of people punching him with their fist and also beating him with clubs before he was taken to Pilat. I saw even the children spitting at him, mocking him even the ones that he had healed which broke my heart even more. The demons had even taken over the children, and how that hurt him the most. I began to cry, and cry because I was right there watching the mob so overtaken by the intensity of hatred they had for him and how they beat him.

Indeed he should’ve died. No human could’ve withstood the blows. But I knew angels were ministering to him and given him heavenly strength, as was shown to St. Anne Emmerich. Then I saw Jesus’ back on the cross. I was at the foot of the cross with blessed Mother crying and crying remembered all the good he had done for mankind, for these people, for me.

The goodness and love of God on the cross for us as I cried and cried overwhelmed with sadness. Then again saw Jesus being handed to blessed Mother when he died. She then handed him to me, his bride, to hold. Then we were in the tomb and blessed Mother told me to stay with him there again as I cried, and cried remembering that I had put him there with my sins. How lonely Jesus was now in the tomb all alone and desiring his brides to respond to him even now to also stay with him in the tomb in this hour. Spend time with him <3

– From Jesus with Love

Overconfidence and The Power of The Sign of the Cross

journal entry from april 10, 2020

Hey Family,

We here in the community are tucking in with the Lord this holy week in preparation for Easter.

Well we had an interesting incident occur 2 days ago would you believe we had a fire. So here in the community many times we are unable to take the trash down into town so we have an open space in the meadow where we burn our trash. Two of my brothers are the ones who take care of them and it happens about every other day. However, on this particular day it was very windy not only that he threw quite of bit of styrofoam installation in the trash pile. That was a no go, because we were unaware how flammable and how the degree from the installation carries over but oh boy now do we know. 

It was in the morning and I usually go up on the mountain ridge to pray and do the Lords supper. However,  for some reason I felt led to stay close to the house and pray right behind the sheep pen in the meadow. I now realize that was the Lord, because as I was praying I began to see a lot of smoke and that was a bit unusual to me. As we have burned trash before but never was the smoke so black and so much. However, I continued to pray as the smoke died down I thought everything was okay then I caught with the glimpse of my eye the fire had reached the grass by the sheep pen which I was behind and it was just a few feet away from the forest trees. I immeaditley got up and tried to radio for my brother Adam  who started the fire to no avail. However, another brother Freddy was in the house and I called to him that there was a fire and I wasn’t sure what to do. He said “Get water” lol. So I rushed and pulled the gallons of water we had next to the house near the sheep pen. He grabbed the water huge water jug and began to pour it on the areas of the grass where there was fire still going. On the remainder he just stepped on it with his shoes and we poured the water on the corner of the sheep pen where it was smoking. Wheew it was a close call thinking the fire was dead but we were wrong. As he went away and I sat down again I saw no flames inside the sheep pen roaring. I immediately jumped up this time and thought of St. Francis, how he would always do the sign of the cross in any situation. One time was about to have a surgical procedure where they had to use a flame to sterile the area. He commanded “brother flame” as he called all of Gods creation his brothers or sisters because they too were created by God, to not burn him and sure enough. He felt no pain when the flame touched his body. The fire had yielded to his command. So I then did the sign of the cross over the flames that were now roaring out of the roof of the sheep pan and commanding the flames to cease. I then asked the Holy Angels to please assist us in killing this fire. Then I ran to get my brothers again and just then two more of my brothers showed up as we raced against time to now kill this roaring fire before it spread. It took about 10 minutes, 2 more huge jugs of water to kill the fire completely in the shed.  

Once we were all done I went to go sit back down with the Lord in adoration as all these thoughts came to my mind. As I said to him 

Oh my goodness Lord, just witnessed a possible forest fire could’ve turned really bad but I thank you so much for your mercy and great compassion towards us that you allowed me to see that to call for help. I couldn’t help but think Lord this indeed a prophetic sign that you are speaking to us here in the community and also to affirm the word you gave about the Forest fires coming

Jesus is there anything on your heart?

Jesus began,

My beloved ones yes, I am here and this was a stark reminder and warning for over confidence. As I mentioned in the Lords supper yesterday

(as an aside here he was referring to the second reading he gave us during the Lords Supper we did together as a group the night before it was  1 Corinthians 10:1-12

“ For I do not want you to be ignorant of the fact, brothers and sisters that our ancestors were all under the club and that they all passed through the sea. They were all baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea. They all ate the same spiritual food and drank the same spiritual drink; for they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ. Nevertheless, God was not pleased with most of them; their bodies were scattered in the wildness. Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from seeing our hearts on evil t things as they did. and do not grumble as some of them did and were killed by the destroying angle. These things happened to  them as examples and were written down as warning for us on whole the culmination of the ages has come. So if you think you are standing firm, be careful lest you fall.” 

I remember telling them all. Oh uh guys the Lord is telling us to watch out for pride there is a test of pride coming so we need to be careful not to grumble or complain or be overconfident in anything and sure enough the next day he allowed this.)

Jesus continued,

“I am calling you all to be more mindful not just of your thoughts, and attitude of heart but your as actions as well. Mother Clare was right to say that overconfidence causes you to do thing more in haste which causes error and can be detrimental for the community. I know you know a thing or two about, that why I want you to really adhere to Mother and Father wisdom and council. You will be sent out soon but, you too must be mindful of the small details little one. Truly some of the smallest decision can be life or death for those who I have called you to be care taker over beloved do you understand?” 

Me: Yes Lord I do please help me I can definitely be absent minded

Jesus continued

“Absent minded means to have your mind absent in the moment and yes beloved I love how you are always thinking of me but I am with you and with your mind truly on me I will keep it in the moment. So that you continue to stay diligent alert in the moment and doing all your actions even the smallest detail with love.”

Me: Okay Lord thank you so much please help us all here in the community to me more mindful 

Jesus responded,

“I am doing that even now and this was indeed to affirm the message I have given you beloved. Please when I give you a word and you confirm its from me get to work beloved. I desire my people to hear the word now beloved this calamity is knocking at their door and my desire is that they would prepared and ready. You were right to first pray and make the sign of the cross indeed even fire which I created bows down to me beloved. My people, prayer and the sign of the cross with all sincerity and intention is powerful. You are provoking the God head, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit all that we are to your circumstance or situation. That is why many saints used the sign of the cross to cause creatures, people, circumstances, demons and element to submit to my will. So as you see these forest fires come about and they are very near to you my people began to pray. Use the sign of the cross to bless your house, to bless your community, to bless your forest area Iands and I promise you I will leave you unharmed or untouched. Use the sign of the cross where the forest is blazing and I will send my angels to come and assist too tame the fires down . So now I am given you insight to the authority, grace and anointing I have given you my people to use in order to bring my glory forth and to show case my mercy. Please adhere to these words my little ones, my beloved one I am with you all.”

Thank you Lord!

-From Jesus with Love

Intimacy with Jesus: “When You Are In Love With God”

The Lord desires that I do a series on Intimacy with God: When you are in love because there is all the difference when you love God and when you are in Love with him. For the times that are coming upon the earth it’s you have to be in love with him to withstand the onslaught. 


Not only that but it is Holy week and Jesus is desiring and longing for the very real presence of his bride. He wants are hearts and mind off of the world and preparing ourselves for our wedding with him!! Eek He desires that you too would see and hear him this grace is available for everyone..” he isn’t an easy catch” as he says lol. You must desire him above all things and persons of this world..just as when you are on love with some one you pursue them. You don’t give up so easily. So will will be breaking down some pointers and seeking the Lord as to what he has to say about how to fall in love with him

When You Are In Love With Some One You:


*Want to Spend All Your Time With Them

*They Are Always On Your Mind (Purity)

*You  Share Everything with them (Togetherness & Sorrows and joys)

*You Are Faithful and Loyal To Them

-From Jesus with Love

Forest Fires Are Coming

Hello Family this message was given to me April 4, 2020 in my journal entry and prophetically has come to passed with all the fires raging in our nation.

I came before Jesus in prayer saying,

Lord here I come before you in faith again, you played two songs about wanting to speak to me. So I know your heart is burdened. Then I felt led to use the bible to get some scripture readings from you and the word 

“Baruch” came in my heart and sure enough the first reading I got was from the Book of Baruch extended letter from Jeremiah 

(side note these scriptures the Lord gave me two were from the Apocryphal book of the Old Testament. The reason they are not included in our Protestant bibles because they were removed because the Jewish scribes didn’t believe the books were inspired. The original 1611 KJV contained the Apocrypha, it was removed in later editions.  The book of Ben Sirach or Ecclesiastic is in the Orthodox bible and is considered a book of wisdom. The Book of Baruch is extension of the prophets the theme is that the salvation of Israel is found on wisdom so just a background first for those that may protest how the Lord gave me this word )

So as I opened the bible my fingers fell on verse 62..of the Book Baruch wouldn’t you know. concerning fire falling from the skies on forest

Baruch 6:62 “and fire, sent from on high to burn up the mountains and the forest, carries out its command. But these false gods are not their equal, whether in appearance or in power.” then the second reading was from

Ezekiel 3:14-17

And the spirit lifted me up, and took me away, and I went off my spirit any and bitter for the hand of the Lord pressed hard on me. Thus I came to the  exiles who lived at Telabib by the river Chebar and there where they dwelt, I stayed among them distraught for seven days at the end of the seven days the world of the Lord came to me:

Son of man I have appointed you a sentinel for the house of Israel When you hear a word from my mouth you shall warn them for me

Third reading I got was Ben Sira 17:24-29

But to the penitent he provides a way back and encourages those who are losing hope!

Turn back to the Lord and give up your sins. pray before him and make your offenses few. Turn again to the Most high and away from iniquity, and hate intensely what he loathes. Who in Sheol can glorify the Most High in place of the living who offer there praise? The dead can no more give praise than those who have never lived; they who are alive and well glorify the Lord. How great is the mercy of the Lord, and his forgiveness for those who return to him!

Lord I can’t help but think there are  more calamities coming and you want me to warn yet again

Jesus began,

“Yes beloved why do you continue to cowar in fear?”

Well to be honest Lord, I tremble at your word and more importantly I don’t want to lead anyone astray with these words. Thinking they are from you when they are from me. As you can see I am still struggling with unbelief. Oh help me Lord

Jesus responded,

“Oh my little one, truly I need you to trust me more and more beloved. Trust what I have called you to be and trust the words I speak to you. In later times you will go back and see how clearly you have heard from me” 

Lord and what about discernment? I struggle with that too when I get rhemas that really don’t clearly confirm its you speaking to me, but then I also get readings to not delete the messages. In fear it makes me want to stop altogether and just let it sit there for a while until i get some clarity

Jesus responded,

Well that is wisdom beloved. When it doesn’t seem clear always go to others. I have made Mother Clare and Father Ezekiel your third legs of discernment. So go before them and even then when you are unsure re-read what I have spoken. Even if they may be strong words if it leaves you with a profound peace, understanding, and direction dear one then many times it is from me. I will use your writings and your journals to teach others discernment. I desire to speak to all my brides but, many are so afraid and walk in unbelief. So I do want you to teach them about intimacy. For out of intimacy will flow greater trust and confidence in my words to them little one”

 okay Lord thank you for the understanding. So those scriptures Lord are they heralding warnings for things to come again?

(at this time guys I was getting tense again and still doubting whiles typing this)

Jesus continued,

“Relax my little one, relax and just continue to write. Yes, beloved the things that are coming are so devastating dear one. Many will not be able to comprehend why or what is going on. It will be one after the other dear one. How I am truly calling my sleeping ones to wake up from their slumber as this pandemic and plague dies off so another will rise right on its heels.  Forest fires are coming this summer all over your nation none like ever before destroying crops, fields, homes and lively hood its going to be an immense challenge for your nation and forest fire workers beloved many of my animals will also be caught in the fire in the thick of it and perish. Many will then began to cry out where is God in all of this? And I respond to you my people that I am here. I have always been here waiting for you to respond. Will you now to see that the earth is passing away and there is nothing good in it. Will you now began to see that your life is, but a vapor and give it to me? Will you now began to see that your fortresses, your hopes, your wealth and even your health cannot save you, but only I can. 

Call out to me my people I am waiting to hear my beloved ones cry out to me in great humility and contrition turning from there sinful ways that I may heal their land. But many will say how have I sinned? I am a god person, I have gone to church, I pay tithe? Oh my beloved ones, working out your salvation is much more than that. It is a total desire to live free from sin. I have called you to be holy as I am holy.  It is a renunciation of comprises. Small foxes that continue to spoil the vine, it is a deep examination of your conscious as to how you have lived your lives. Are you truly following me, are you loving your neighbor as yourself, are you helping the sick, the poor, the hungry? Not just with a donation here and there, but truly is your heart to live for others, for my kingdom or for yourselves and your family. 

Please wake up me dear ones, rise from your slumber and sleep no more . I am doing a great shaking before the great awakening comes upon the whole world. Indeed the harvest is plenty, but the labors are few. Now to my faithful ones, there are those all around seeking me in their hearts, seeking answers to their questions and you have the answers. This is a great time to share my love, my hope and faith with all those around you. Please don’t shy from this opportunities I bring before you. The opportunities will be countless, so please my beloved brides stand with me.  I know many of you are weary, but stand with me. A time of great harvest is coming and it is even here now.”

 Oh Lord help us, help me because I am truly one of your weary ones. Give us all the strength to stand and believe with great hope not only for ourselves but for those around us.

Jesus responded,

“My beloved one, yes indeed I am releasing graces even now for those to rise in great strength and faith in this hour and I hear the worries of your heart and anxieties beloved. Everything I promised you will come to past even in the midst of chaos. Remember I do make beauty from ashes and make a beautiful masterpiece out of ruins. So my faithfulness will be a testimony to all who witness what I do even in the midst of this trial “

Okay Lord your words are truly comforting, living waters which I love to drink. Love you Jesus thank you so much

“love you too my little one, and all the little ones that take heed and listen with great faith I am with you all stay encouraged”

-From Jesus with Love

A Curse of A Hardened Heart

Matthew 13: 14 So they show that what Isaiah said about them is true: ‘You people will listen and listen, but you will not understand. You will look and look, but you will not really see. Yes, the minds of these people are now closed. They have ears, but they don’t listen. They have eyes, but they refuse to see.

I came back from doing a message outside and he had given me “ Gods correction”. I was a bit concerned asking the Lord to show me the error of my ways and felt prompted to get 3 rhemas to get direction and I pulled  

Acts 28:26-27 Hardened Hearts

“Go to these people and say you will indeed hear but never understand and you will indeed see but never perceive. For these peoples hearts have grown dull and with their ears they can barely hear and their eyes they have closes lest they should see with there eyes and hear with their eyes”

So I was perplexed and sat with the Lord on my  bed in adoration and a flood of emotions came over me. Such grief and sadness because I understood that even in this pandemic and trial the Lord has allowed, many have not gotten it. Many still don’t understand or have a desire to repent, to draw nearer to the Lord and live for him.  The word “ curse of hardened heart” kept ringing in my mind.

Lord is there anything you want to say? My heart is breaking

Jesus began,

Yes my little one, how my heart and that of the Fathers is breaking for the people of the world. There has been a curse of hardened hearts released upon my people. How their love for me have grown cold even in this trial I have allowed to cover the whole world. You would think many would began to wake up to realize that not only am I real, that not only am I God, but that I am calling my people to a change of heart. I am calling my people back to their first love, but how very few have responded. Many are seeing this lock down as a time of relaxation, a time to get off work, a time to relax be with their families and binge watch shows. 

Many are taking opportunities to scoff and mock at my servants, at my prophets, who are speaking the truth. Calling the people to wake up from their slumber that I am indeed coming. How so many scoff at my wisdom and continue to incline themselves to their human reasoning. Many continue to draw to the earth climate change as the cause of these calamities. They are lies, lies, lies, formed by satan and the evil ones to take the minds and hearts of  my people away from the truth. Away from examining their conscience and continue to ignore that gnawing feeling that something is coming, that something is happening, that change needs to happen in their lives. No, instead they continue to feed their vanities, feed their flesh in this time with the latest news, new purchases as consolation and comforts from the void they feel in their hearts. 

Oh how my heart is breaking dear one it is because of you little ones who have indeed laid yourself down, humbled yourself and prayed that is why my mercy has been relentless, but how much longer what will it take my people. You obstinate minds and stiff necked natures you continue on about as it will be business as usual when these quarantines are lifted. Do you not see my hand in this? Do not ignore my calling any longer. The day of salvation is at hand and it is now. The door of Mercy will not be opened for ever my hardened heart ones. Indeed you have eyes, but you do not see me crying out all around you. To turn your heart back to me away from the word and your selfishness. You indeed have ears, but you do not hear the warning from my shepherds, prophets, and pastors. You do not hear the voice crying out in the wilderness make straight the way for the Lord. Rather you scoff and say I have heard it before, oh yea He his coming, but no one knows the day or hour. I tell you the fig tree is blooming and this is the season 

(here is quoting Matthew 24:32 “Now learn this lesson from the fig trees; As soon as its twigs het tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near. 33 Even so, when you see all these things you know that it is near right at the door.34 Truly I tell you this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened”

You say there is no God and I need not to be held accountable for my life. For I only have one life to live, so I will live it to the fullest. Oh, but I tell you, you have eternity awaiting you. Eternity where everything will be put into account. My dearly loved ones I paid that price on cavalry to have you right next to me. 

Please heed my call. Please hear the cry of my heart and harden your heart no longer. Do not be like that thief on the cross who scoffed at his time of salvation. He did not know that that very cross, that very trial, that very moment was the moment of his salvation. Yet he rejected it and treated me with scorn and contempt, however the other thief recognized me in the midst of his pain, in the midst of his trial, in the midst of his cross. He heard the voice of his shepherd, he reached out and received his salvation. For he knew he deserved everything I had allowed and he knew my infinite goodness and mercy. So my mercy is yet again extended to you.  My mercy time and time again will not fail. It is fathomless and and abounding, but it will not be available forever my dear ones. Run to the arms of our merciful savior or when we meet you will be face to face with the just judge. My beloved ones, my brides please pray for these hardened hearted ones. Pray for this nation and the world. Pray against this curse of hardened heart that have caused many to continue on the road to destruction and have seared conscious, but nothing is impossible for me and my mercy will triumph over judgment pray for them.’

That was the end of Jesus message

Be The Light

This morning I was getting down from my bed and my computer fell from the top bunk and cracked. Furthermore, I had been chided by Mother Clare and Father Ezekiel of not taking care of things well. Which is so true because I had just got this computer fixed a week before so I was devastated and disappointment in myself. Since the Lord was telling me to began writing again. Also I do all my work on the channel using this laptop so I was frustrated thinking this had to be the enemy. 

I came before the Lord during prayer as I felt he began speaking to me. 

Jesus began,

“My beloved don’t be too hard on yourself. It would’ve been wise to leave it at a safer place, but who do you think knocked it over?”

The devils Lord

 Jesus responded,

“Yes, Beloved I want you from now on to anoint and bless any equipment or ministry materials you receive. The devils hate the assignment I have given you and  will do all they can to frustrate my plans, but I wont allow it. I do however allow these things to not only cause you to be aware, but to pray more and to grow in patience. An offering a gift you can give to me for the salvation of souls.”

Okay Lord forgive me I renounce frustration, impatience and bitterness.

Jesus continued,

“Now the readings I gave you and the songs I played were all about faith beloved. Did you  not ask me to make you a great women of faith?”

Yes Lord I just didn’t know the cost lol

Jesus responded,

“Well, my little one with great faith comes great test, great breaking and great patience endurance. Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not yet seen. To hope in the impossible takes great faith and great faith starts with a  small mustard seed of faith. So I’m not asking for your faith to be big more like I am asking you to hope greatly that I am who I say I am and that I can do all things. This generation will be known for the great exploits and showmanship of my power than any other generation. I am calling my people to have great hope in me, to believe as the times get darker so will great faith arise. It must arise to shader the darkness and cause the enemy to retreat. For so long my people have been held captive by fear, fear of the me, fear of delusion, fear of man and fear of the enemy, but I am calling my people to believe again, hope again in great faith the things that I will do in and through them. For those who are desiring to move in the supernatural gifts, it is available for you. The treasure of heaven is available for all my people all they must do is ask. I have a storehouse where the angels wait to hear the command of my people to release gifts,but my people don’t ask rather they fear it and walk in so much unbelief. Come to me my people come to the Father who owns a cattle on a thousand hills and gives to all generously who ask. Give yourself entirely to me in consecration and holiness and greater works will you do and see all for my glory.”

 Lord if I may I remember you told me that in order to have faith “take more risk”

Jesus continued,

Yes beloved one, my people fear being rejected or doubt the results of things,but step out in faith and obedience and allow me to do the rest. Rarely is there a time a sincere prayer is prayed for a soul and returned void. Sometimes the fruit you don’t see but there is always fruit when you step out in faith. So my people I’m calling faith to rise even in you now. Do you have the lame, sick around you step out in my love to touch them. I am their hope and believe I can and will do the impossible and I might just surprise you. (smiling) Im calling my people to count the cost and began to live out the life of what they say they believe

Do you believe I can raise the dead?

Do you believe I can heal the sick?

Do you believe I can open blind eyes?

Do you believe I can transform a hardened heart?

Do you believe I can do all these things through you?

If you say you believe then what are you doing about it?

My beloved ones take risk hope against hope believe I tell you believe ask for the this gift began to walk in them now. When you see someone in need ask for me to stretch out my hands through your heart and touch them and leave the results to me. Great works will I do in and through you

Lord Can I share the vision you gave me a while back is that okay?

Yes, beloved it will greatly inspire others and to what I have in store for this generation for those who believe . Remember deep faith comes from Intimacy with me.”

So I had a vision family, of a family member who was away from home. I received a letter from them and I was cleaning up my room. When I touched his envelope I immediately went into an open vision. I saw this family member being met by the youth leader of my church at the time and his friends in the parking lot of my church for prayer. The all laid hands on him and began to pray I was just watching. No street lights were on so it was dark however as they began to pray I saw little bulbs of light over my family members head. Then as I looked closely they were getting bigger and I realized they were angels. They began to descend and ascend up and down as they were praying for this family member. The light then overshadowed them all as they were all glowing. Then my family member changed into a man who I knew was on drugs and after they prayed he was completely transformed and restored. He was so in shock seeing the physical transformation of himself he asked to join us. We said sure, then there was a group of us as we went into the streets simply touching the homeless, prositutes, drug addicts and they were immeadielty healed by a touch. They too where in shock and all asked to follow us. Then I saw a dark hill, then one light, then two lights, then three and four then so forth until the whole hill was lite up then I cam out of the vision. The scripture that came to mind was “ a city on a hill”. Mt 5:14 

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.

 That is what this last generation will be like!

We Are In The Days Of Noah

March 13, 2020 Journal Entry

I had someone very close to me call yesterday. I was really glad to hear from that because I wanted to thank them for a book and a card they had sent me. Boy was I in for a surprise because I hadn’t talked to this person for a while and it seemed they had much on their heart.

I have mentioned to you guys in the previous post that I was just getting my confidence in hearing From Jesus again and sharing the messages he was giving me. 

I had posted a message about President Donald Trump on my Facebook page just a few days earlier before receiving this call. The Lord was affirming his re-election and presidency. So this person wasn’t too happy about that. They were very angry and disappointed about things the Lord had told me to share on social media. I knew it was the enemy speaking through them to discourage me from writing or having faith that I was hearing from the Lord because that is exactly where he hit.

As this person went on to say that I wasn’t hearing From Jesus and not only that I would get more likes and gain popularity if I would stay away from prophecies, end times message and politics because in every generation they always say “Jesus is coming” and no one knows the day or the hours. That I should just focus on preaching the gospel like other ministers do. At first I was a bit shocked then all I could do was laugh inside because I knew it was sooo the enemy really trying to discourage me from writing. As the person continued to rant on the phone I thought to myself “really Satan that all you got”.  He is good at doing that for all those who desire to follow Jesus whole heartedly. The Lord releases a grace on you and the enemy can see the areas you are struggling with. As his demons taunt you with doubt, unbelief, and fear concerning what the Lord is calling you to do. You struggle interiorly and even in prayer you cry out to the Lord about it. Then satan sends someone to tempt you or scorn you concerning that very thing. To cause you to question, second guess yourself or feed into that doubt. However, if you recognize him immediately that he loses every time. We all can be used by the devil, he uses weak Christians to attack others. I have been there myself.

This is the second time the, the devil, has pulled this one on me. I remember in my second year walking with Jesus I would press in fervently in the Lord presence in prayer at my apartment. It seemed my life had become just work and prayer. I wasn’t seeing any real fruit then nor any real consolations so I found myself being discontent, frustrated and thinking about being more laxed. The thought kept rising in my head “just live a little”, go out have some fun”..Remember the old days, see you gave your life to the Lord and look at it now, its not fun at all”. As all these thoughts assailed me I did tell the Lord in prayer that I just wanted to live a little because my life was just all about prayer, but soon realized how foolish it was and repented.  I even did a blog about it, you can read here.

Then the very next day my brother in law comes over and says the exact same words to me. That I am not called to be a pastor and I am trying to be “holy ,holy” I should just live a little.  I thought to myself waaaa, was he here in my apartment yesterday when I was crying?? Of course not, but the demons were and they knew very well how to tempt me. All I could do was laugh thinking “uh uh not today Satan, not today”. Imagine if I would’ve listened to those senseless thoughts and suggestions from the devils and others. I wouldn’t be where I am with Jesus today, 4 years later.

So after this person got done giving me their opinion, I kindly told them I respected their stance, I loved them, but I had to listen to the Lord and wasn’t at all interested in likes or popularity only Gods will. After I got off the phone I wasn’t even offended, but I did repent for impatience and frustration in my heart towards them.  It actually made me want to pray more because I realize how so many, even Christians are blinded and hardened to the reality of the times that we are living. So I stayed up and prayed for them and souls who are just like him.  They just don’t know, Father forgive them because I too was one as I came before Jesus saying,

Lord, do you have anything on your heart you would like to share?

Jesus began,

I’m here little one, continue to write my beloved thank you for stopping to discernment.

(I had to stop because the voice I was hearing was very condescending on others and I knew it wasn’t the Lords heart So the first two readings got “laziness”, and “long life” in the BP to walk in the way of the Lord. So I bound any lying spirits and continued to write)

Jesus continued,

yes by faith beloved continue writing by faith. We are one and I do dwell within you as I mentioned I am a breath away.  It truly is easy as breathing just write what is flowing from your heart little one. I am indeed  astounded at the profound unbelief in my body and in my brides little one. So many have made me a “thing”, a “religion”, or even “a religious idea”, but they truly have no faith to believe in me or in my words little one. How it grieves me, so many have taken my words, my promises and my warnings for granted. This soul was right to say that many ministers preach the gospel, but it’s just their own gospel it is not my gospel dear one. You are called to do My will and not the will of man. How many chosen shepherds have strayed away because of the fear of man. Strayed way because of the scorn and contempt they would face if they spoke truth and lived by the truth, but I am upsetting the apple cart. I am doing a new thing. I am raising the lowly, the over looked, the rejected, the unwise, and unlearned. 

Those who will follow me and worship me alone in spirit and truth. Those who will lay down their lives for my service and that of their brothers. Those who care not of the accolades, the respect or honor of men, but live for what heaven says alone. We are indeed in the days of Noah. Oh how my faithful servant tarried for so many years, 120 years to be exact. What do you think the people said, the same thing they say now. “Your foolish, your calling bluff, your crying wolf, your inciting fear, preach something we want to hear, what has never rained.”

As my people say, “what coming?”. “Yes, you have been saying the Lord is coming for a while now, for years, even centuries”, but my people have fallen asleep. Oh how my apostles faced the same scrutiny and contempt in preaching the coming kingdom. So do not be dismayed or discouraged my little one, you may be small in stature, but in me you stand tall and will continue to do so. Tell them my beloved one of their offenses towards me. Tell them I am indeed coming and I am looking for pure hearts and clean hands. Those who have ears to hear will hear. Those who continue to rely on their own opinion, own agendas and own desires will fall at the waste side. Pray for them dear ones, pray for them fervently. For your King is coming and has his reward in hand!

 This is all for now my little one, my very precious little one .I love you dearly my beloved child. Go now in the peace and courage of your God.”

-From Jesus With Love