When Your Pregnant But No One Notices

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So how can one be pregnant carrying something in their womb but no one notices? That’s what you call spiritual pregnancy. You see every person was sent on this earth with Gods seed of light in them. Carrying a mission and a DNA in them that they only can uniquely accomplish which is called a destiny.  Many unfortunately never birth what God created them for out of fear,  laziness, comfortability, distraction, pride,  etc and many more down right reject Jesus…. the only one who is able to birth the missions into completion.  As a believer its important we are aware of this. You are carrying a seed of heaven within you that is meant to impact not only the world but, eternity. You must first recognize that your carrying something to ensure you don’t abort it.

Psalm 22:9-10
Yet you brought me out of the womb; you made me trust in you, even at my mother’s breast. 
 From birth I was cast on you; from my mother’s womb you have been my God.

 

First Trimester- the most critical (don’t turn back to the world)

So this is the month of conception when you finally say yes to Jesus to surrender all to him and make Lord of your life. The Holy Spirit comes dwell within you and bring life to the seed God has placed in you.

  • THE BREAKING
  • This was a time for me of excitement I knew I was called by the Lord but, wasnt sure for what or how he would use me.  In excitement I told everyone thinking they would be excited too but realized very quickly spiritual pregnancy is not at all like physical pregnancy. Not everyone will be happy for you or even understand lol It’s okay because the conception was between you and the holy spirit. He actually is very private and loves to work behind the scenes so trust him.
  • In this trimester there is no number to how long the season will be. So you have to trust even when you don’t see anything growing. You must’n be moved by what people say or seek peoples validation it could cause you to turn back to the world.
  • Just as you would in your a physical pregnancy you have to change attitudes and create healthy habits for the baby. That’s the same with a spiritual pregnancy in this season. There will be a lot of opposition and spiritual warfare that will tempt you to give up. Don’t fall for it! You have to began some healthy habits of prayer, seeking the Lord, purity of eye, mind and body. So the Holy spirit can dwell in you fully now that your heart has become his home. So press on family you have something to birth!

 

Second Trimester-Growing in the things of the Lord

  • THE TESTING & PRUNING
  • People began to see something is different about you, a “glow” of course the LIGHT OF CHRIST IN YOU!
  • Once you pass the first trimester season it doesn’t get any easier necessarily but you do gain more trust in God and his promises. In this season you began to see some growth, some fruit showing in your life. Your growing in virtue as the Lord continues to test and prune you.
  • The only way you can grow is through testing and trials. Don’t be discouraged the more trials you face are opportunities for accelerated maturity in Christ.
  • In this season I began to grow in my faith as Jesus began to answer prayers. He just left me in awe of him. I began to be sure of my identity in Christ not by what he did through me or even what others said but by His words. I knew I was carrying something in me and was excited to see what God had planned.’ In this season i really learned about suffering and laying down my life for the Lord in order for him to trust me with the gift that is inside of me.
  • I realized in this season Jesus began to trust me! He trusted me with revelation, secret of his heart and direction. He would ask of me to do things for him to see if I would be obedient and faithful in the small things. So press on family you have something to birth!

 

Third Trimester-Birth pains (persevere don’t give up, don’t abort)

  • THE BREAKING, THE TESTING, THE PRUNING, THE WORKING, THE SUFFERING, & DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN lol
  • Don’t complain began to praise God for what he is about to birth in you. Let your faith arise in expectancy for what your hoping for even if you don’t see!
  • In this trimester/season people can testify of the work God is doing in you and even the vision God has but, many wont understand the process….I tell you too preserver. Don’t give in to people’s criticism or praise for it will be to your ruin. Unshakable faith is looking only for praise and or correction of God alone. He alone has a just viewpoint of your heart and knows your motive.
  • In this season God will continue to break you in areas you thought you were strengthen, test you further by stretching you, prune more layers in your heart, allow you to suffer in various ways all while doing work for him. In order to see if you truly desire to live for him and him alone.
  • You may have a vision or a knowing of the mission the Lord has within you but all the pieces haven’t come together yet. However, you see his footprints in the different steps he has taken you on to get you prepared and ready.
  • I am in that season now and I believe its the most critical because so much going on around you spiritually for the birth of what God has in you. Many times the Lord will put you on bed rest (a waiting period, where you have to endure patiently until the mission is ready to be birth) In this period is where you will get opinions from everyone else about what you should and shouldn’t be doing. Many people questioning your walk or vision with the Lord because they don’t see the “baby” but you must preserver. Trust in what God has spoken to you and know that this is a vital time to listen and walk closely with Jesus. To preserver in obedience to him and him alone. One wrong choice could cause you delay and leave you murmuring on in the wilderness until death like the Israelites. So endure patiently family something great is about to birth in you for his glory!!!

 

Jeremiah 1:5
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart

-From Jesus with Love

When You Mess Up, Don’t Run From Him But Too Him

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I found myself this weekend kind of avoiding my alone time with the Lord as my heart and mind were swarming with thoughts of discouragement, frustration, weariness, discontent, and confusion. For the past couple of days I have been having difficulty in hearing from the Lord clearly and I would seek him for a rhema word  yet not really understand what he was directing me to do. I was getting words from him about “Laziness” twice in a row (eeeh I hate getting that besides sin and pride, makes me cringe) The rhema book provided scriptures on slothfulness so anytime the Holy Spirit gives me laziness it definitively not a good thing. He then also gave me rhemas about specifically being given priceless gifts from heaven and I need to use them or on that day before the Lord I will have many sorrows. So I felt the Holy Spirit telling me  I am being passive or lazy about work, ministry work to be exact. Not utilizing my gifts for the kingdom with the time he has given me. The confusion came because I am not working at this time which I strongly believe was a commission from the Lord to trust him to open the door to the place he wants me at and not just any job.  Then he gave me another rhema of “Submitting to Authority” I began to see how serious he was thinking what have I missed because I have been patiently waiting for 8 months, so getting this word twice threw me in a spat of confusion. Which of course opened the door to the enemies oppression.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

I began to entertain lies from the enemy and get in my flesh. I found myself complaining and honestly being frustrated with the Lord ( I know) but, I was. It has been difficult this season being back home believing it was God’s will. Babysitting watching my nieces pretty mush the whole half of the day whiles my sister works. Then trying to squeeze ministry work in late at night even staying up way into the AM just to get things done. So as I began to resist the Lords admonishments I opened my heart to receive all the arrows of the enemy saying ” I missed God”, “whats the point”, “everything I am doing is in vain anyway” “what I am doing is not good enough”, “He was the one who told you to come here so how can he expect you to be focused in this environment”. Yes I began to entertain all these thoughts and lies, as I did I began to run to food for comfort as well in the midst of my fast, just feeling like throwing in the towel to give up already. Thoughts of overwhelming sadness, my heart hurting, disappointment grief, and condemnation came over me. So I knew I had to rush into prayer to repent, ask the Lord to clean my heart but I had been avoiding this the whole day. I knew Jesus doesn’t condemn but, I kept thinking oh how I bet he will be disappointment and I deserve this oppression and to be honest I just didn’t feel like praying .

(SIDE NOTE: SPIRITUAL WARFARE 101 Whenever in your walk with the Lord you don’t feel like praying that’s when you NEED TO PRAY all that the more!)

However, when I finally stop fighting my flesh and got into prayer so I can pour my heart out before the Lord in tears. I saw a picture impression upon my heart, of course it wasnt a mad God who had his finger pointing at me saying “how could you”, I am mad at you, or even disappointment. No, I saw Jesus with the sweetest smile just waiting and before I could say or do anything I felt him say “Come hear” and he held me ever so tightly so close to his heart as my head was under his chin. All I could do was began to cry and cry. After a few of him holding me I wanted to let go and look him in the face and he wouldn’t let me as if to say. Its okay, just rest hear don’t be so quick to do anything but just stay right here and He held me even more tightly with the greatest compassion and love. I was like Jesus I don’t deserve this, and he said your right you don’t but its my mercy and love for you, that will never change. We had the sweetest communion and of course the Holy Spirit picked the best songs about falling short, stumbling into sin and the last to not give up!

I realized in prayer that I had been walking in a posture of entitlement before the Lord which the root is all pride. That in giving my whole life to the Lord and upon walking in obedience in the midst of this suffering I deserved some things and If they were not coming I had every right to be frustrated. I couldn’t believe how nasty my heart was, wow that I felt entitled. I felt the holy spirit tell me “We don’t deserve his goodness or his judgment”. Wow, we don’t deserve neither, when the Lord saves us, transforms us and even reveals himself to us its all by his mercy. We don’t deserve any of that and when we walk in condemnation, guilt or shame and we believe or the enemy tells us we deserve consequences that’s a lie because we don’t deserve that either. Jesus took upon the cross all of these things so we can walk free freedom as a son or daughter of God without condemnation. How many Christians feel that way in their hearts sometimes and both thoughts make us run away from God rather than too him. The beautiful thing is what we are entitled too as Christians is Free grace, mercy, love, compassion, and companionship because of the sacrifice and blood of our sweet Jesus! SO RUN TO HIM NOT FROM HIM, YOU ARE FORGIVEN!

-From Jesus with Love

 

 

 

 

Losing My Job To Work For Jesus

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I keep hearing this statement from others “Your one of the busiest people I know with no job”and I realize how very true that is lol. I am working, just working for Jesus now. When I was let go from my job 8 months ago I had no idea what the Lord had ins tore for me. First going through all different emotions of confusion, anxiety, fear and excitement all at the same time. I remember my co-worker saying “don’t worry Nana, don’t look at this as a demotion but a promotion from the Lord”. I just knew the Lord was releasing me into my calling….which is to work for him not at all what I thought it would look like. As I walk with the Lord I am learning I don’t come anywhere close to having him figured out because many times even what he tells me to do doesn’t turn out like I expect. However, working for Jesus is the best retirement, savings, 401K, insurance anyone can ever have!

1 Corinthians 15: 58
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

MY WORK:
I have come to realize that when you work diligently for the Lord and his kingdom you will be criticized or judged. Don’t be surprised by that. Many times I have statements with people thinking I am striving, performing, religious for the Lord or being legalistic lol. However, my passion & my diligence all come from my love I have for Jesus and sense of urgency. As believers we must understand the times we are living in and the time is so short, JESUS IS COMING and we need to be about the Lords business. The enemy is so good at getting many believers right now distracted about petty frivolous things that will bare no fruit in the kingdom. Even when I was working, the Lord would lead me ever so gently to stay up and do vidoes for him on “his” youtube channel even if it was going on 1 am saying ” work whiles there is still daylight (john 9:4)” He would wake me up in the middle of the night to pray.  He would lead me too began a blog and to be diligent about it no matter what. Then at some point had me going out to evangelizing from 3-6 everyday working for him. He now has me leading a small group in our churches young adults ministry, overseeing volunteers at my church, leading monthly outreaches, teaching on youtube, blogging, and most recently taking up piano and sketching! I love it all! Yes, there have been many times I have been weary, discouraged, honestly sometimes even sick and Jesus would so sweetly say to me ” My grace is sufficient for you, if you will do it I will provide more grace to complete it”. He did every time, it would amaze me and in those moments I came to see not only how Gods grace works but, appreciate it all that the more. I began to cultivate a closer relationship with the Holy Spirit, realizing how its Him who does all the work through us all the time. I know work to build up the Kingdom of God in every way possible, my time and my life is not my own anymore. So what work has God called you too and you have been making excuses, been scared or have been delaying, or just down right disobedient? I want to encourage you…..GET TO WORK…we need you in the kingdom!

MY PROVISION:
Wow, if that is one thing the Lord has been teaching me this year is trusting him with my finances and provision. I don’t think I ever have and I can’t say I have complete trust yet however, I know this is a soft spot for many believers. Oh, if we would all just trust him the enemy would no longer have a foot hold on many who are at jobs, places, destinations they were never intended for but they stay for security, convenience or for status. GOD WILL PROVIDE. Once losing my job I was unemployment for 6 months and the Lord kept telling me to trust him with provision to continue working for him and not to look for a job. He finally spoke to me about a job but it didn’t come thru (hence don’t have him figured out lol) .Then a week before my unemployment is about to run out I get a call from my former employer that I have a 401k that I am able to cash out….I was like waaa lol. It came right on time, then of course fear masquerading as “caution” that I need to be wise I can just use that money I should save it but I have come to know in the economy of God. Its all about giving away, sowing, giving until it hurts then the Lord will bring the increase. So I trusted the Lord cashed it out and began sowing in the kingdom in anyway I could trusting that I would sow all that I reaped. Sure enough with my funds getting low again. I got a call from a friend stating they had scholarship money from school and the Lord put me on their heart to sow into what He was doing. I was like, #HUSHJESUSHUSH yet again Lord you came thru!

I am not “vocationally working” for anyone. I have no car or any job prospects. In the eyes of many I may look like lost potential, a bum or even out of my mind lol but, I am working for Jesus. Investing all that I have in the Economy of the Kingdom which will never fail or crash. Trusting and knowing that my return will far out way my investment.  Seek HIS kingdom in all things and everything….I mean everything will be added unto. I am working every so diligently hear on this earth living for eternity. Will you too?

 

Matthew 6:33
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

-From Jesus with Love

Choosing Jesus Or Choosing Nana: The Fight Of Self-Denial

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(Pic credits Kevin Carden website http://www.christianphotoshops.com)

I have found to walk with Christ takes two decisions, first confessing with your mouth and believing in your heart that he is Lord which seals your salvation then…..( the part which majority of us believers struggle with) to DENY YOUR FLESH completely in total surrender that He may live. Which I have come to realize is day by day, decision by decision to choose Jesus rather than to choose Nana. I don’t pass the test every time but the longer I am walking with Christ the more apparent that call seems, the quicker I find myself willing to sacrifice my desires for his…Now I didn’t say easier lol Don’t be mistaken it is hard but dying is never easy.

I had given my life to the Lord at a young age but I hadn’t given him my life. So when the Lord called me to surrender my life 3 years ago I hesitatingly did.  Not realizing it would be the greatest, most amazing and difficult decision I had and will ever make. However, I began to get rhemas from the Lord asking for “total surrender” and I would wonder hmmm Lord I have completely surrendered, (or so I thought) I don’t get it.  You have my heart and my life is yours now. Not realizing he wanted complete control of my time, my body, my money, my plans etc….you name it He wants it all. So many times as believers we declare God you can have it all, whatever you want, my life is yours but do we really mean that and are we willing to live a sacrificial, crucified, hedged in life , denying ourselves every worldly pleasure and living only for the perfect will of God?? I would say many Christians don’t , especially in our generation and in our western Christianity.  I remember the Holy Spirit speaking to me these words:

“In this generation we call obedience legalism and holiness religious”

So true! I remember being so frustrated at times because I slowly started noticing as I walked with Jesus there were many things other Christians could do but I couldn’t. For the life of me I couldn’t understand it. I thought the christian life was suppose to be fun with Jesus! lol No, the Lord was like is “your called to be holy and pure for me”. So I have found myself many times making plans, having personal desires and them being completely adverted because Jesus has plans for me as his bride to do instead. So i have been learning to submitted to my bridegroom.

One instance was two days ago, where I found myself weary at my moms house with all my nieces and nephews over. The day felt like I was taking care of a day care lol. I was unable to get any work done really and wanted to get away. Just then a friend from my Kenya team reminded me of  get together they were hosting at their home. Watching the Avengers movie and eating snacks. So having a strong desire to go, I first wanted to make sure it was okay with the Lord first so I asked him for a rhema I got “Sickness” . Now when I get scriptures about that either I am asking for healing or the Lord is saying my mind is sick, I have come in agreement with wrong thinking…hmmm. So having a slight nudge he didn’t want me to go and would rather have me spend time with him. I thought I am not sick (like I didn’t know) and went anyway lol. As soon as I got in front of their house a song came on the radio guess what the Lyrics where ” There is a sickness in the world where people are looking to fill the void but can only be filled with Jesus” All  I could do was laugh, I was like nooooo. Jesus I am already here (the Lord can use anything to talk to us by the way). Then the second song came on lyrics ” Lord help me to listen to what you tell me to do”. I reasoned with the Lord saying, moms house is crowded where can i go to spend time. Then the idea came to mind to go to my sisters place, she was out of town for  trip so would have the place to ourselves. So with my face in my palm, I looked up looking at the inviting house, movie, fellowship and snacks or leave and head to my sisters. I had a decision to make….To Choose Jesus or Choose Nana. Nana, wanted to have escape, have fun and relax with friends and Jesus wanted to escape with me, have fun and have me relax in his heart…… (with a sigh ) lol I said yes, Lord. I chose Jesus (that is all by his grace)

I made my way to my sisters apartment and there I had 3 hours of the most awesome and intimate time with alone in her walking closet. I left feel at peace, no longer burdened, loved and feeling full of purpose. Jesus has called me and if not all of us to a life of TOTAL SURRENDER . We must understand it takes our permission for the Lord to complete His work in us. He is a gentleman, he wont force his will on you but will you yield to his? Jesus has asked me to live a life denying myself of  the news, of movies, of TV, of Entertainment. of certain food, of sweets, idle time wasted hanging out,  many worldly pleasures, worldly comforts and live on the bare necessities which come from him alone just to name a few.  It feels like a tug of war every time but, God is so gracious and patient with me lol. He has me hedged finely and I am learning to appreciate that rather than complain. I get asked many times lately about intimacy with Jesus and I always tell them one of the many components to walking with Jesus so intimately is to deny yourself, not all at once. The Lord works with us all in stages and by layers, its one day at a time waking up to say I choose you Jesus today above my desires, my plans and my comforts so will you  make a decision and choose Jesus every time? Ask him for the grace to make you willing to be made willing!

Matthew 16:24
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.

-From Jesus With Love

 

 

Jesus Is Waiting, Dont Stand Him Up

 

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Have you ever been stood up? Have you ever kept a date waiting or waiting on date who seems to have no respect for your time? Well, can you believe many times that’s what we do to Jesus. Many times we would like to think God is a distance, cold, judgmental, harsh, unemotional person but, he isn’t at all. Many have him all wrong! We forget that  Jesus came on earth, fully man so he has very real human needs, emotions, desires and longings that only YOU can fulfill.  A  week ago I found myself doing this very thing, I saw Jesus on a picnic table with all this food waiting on me, and he had tears running down his cheeks. Some might say wait, God has needs and desires for me, noooo but, I beg to differ even in scripture he talks about his jealous love for us and how we are His desire.

Song of Solomon 7:10
I belong to my beloved, and HIS DESIRE is for me.

You see as a bride of Christ he longs and desires to be with his bride. Spend quality time with his beloved and how it pains him so much when we neglect him for worldly things or even desires. That’s exactly what I did a few weeks ago. I found myself waking up randomly @5 am abruptly but, peacefully from my sleep. I have come to know when I wake up in the middle of the night full of energy for no reason that is the Holy Spirit waking me up because He has something to say or Jesus calling me into prayer or worship. So I had a strong sense that the Lord was calling me into his bridal chambers to spend some alone time with him. Now at the same time we have very real opposition from the enemy would love for us to be not sensitive to the Lords heart, distracted and put our attention on other things when Jesus calls us. That’s exactly what he did and I fell for it (slap hands to the face).

Instead of me immediately going into prayer and worship I thought to myself let me use the restroom real quick, then after I happened to walk into the kitchen, then I happened to open the fridge out of curiosity, then I happened to see a huge pan of macaroni and cheese my sister had just cooked that night…..I knew immediately this was a snare by the enemy because I wasn’t even hungry but that mac and cheese was calling my name. (Side note the Lord has been really teaching me on self-denial and having self control with me compulsively eating and he already revealed that was a demon of self indulgence that caused me and many others to do that…that’s for a different blog lol). So would I choose Nana (my flesh) or Jesus….and I chose Nana, thinking to myself well Lord just one little bite wont hurt. One bite turned to two bites before I knew it, it was an hour  later and I had kept the Lord waiting whiles I indulged. (another slap to face)

So when I finally went into worship and prayer, oh my goodness my heart was broken to pieces. I saw Jesus on a picnic table with all this food waiting on me, and he had tears running down his cheeks. Which broke my heart and caused me to cry as well. I knew he had been waiting for a long while and I felt in my heart he was so hurt that I chose the macaroni then him. It may seem silly to some that God would care that much in the smallest detail of our lives or even in the decisions that we make to bring him to tears but he does.  He made me to understand that He had this heavenly feast prepared for me  that would’ve satisfied my soul. Yet I chose to follow my flesh instead and indulge on something that only temporally satisfied. Furthermore, to make it more painful I kept him waiting, My God, the creator o the Heavens, the Lover of my soul, My savior called for me and I stood him up over macaroni. He then spoke to my heart how so many of his children do this on a daily bases, I then saw different images of Jesus having a date prepared and just waiting….waiting… being left all alone and most of the time being stood up, no one shows up. It broke my heart because it broke his, I had to ask the Lord to forgive me and I comforted him with my worship.

So I want to challenge you:
How many times have you made a commitment to spend time with Jesus, to go on a date with him, to give him a certain time frame, or certain hour that you designated just for Jesus? Then something comes up, you forget, you do something else a movie, social media or even worse you use that time to spend on someone else and you stand him up. You casually think to yourself, oh God understand, he doesn’t care. Wrong, wrong, wrong….you see he does. The very thought of having quality time with him came from Him. He is so much more excited to spend time with you then you are with him. YOU are the highlight of his day, the apple of his eye, His heaven on earth. In a world where its dark, where majority of the population rejects him, insults him, is angry at him, blasphemes and mocks him. He takes so much solace in hearing one person, one of his brides respond to his love and CHOOSE him from all the things in the world they can do. Do you know how that makes him feel…. it makes him feel like He is indeed Lord of your life and it heals his wounded heart. You bring healing to the heart of your God by worship and prayer. He loves to bask in Your presence, can you believe that….the creator of the universe loves to bask in YOUR presence so will you make take for him and if you have will you be committed to your time and most importantly will you choose Jesus every time when He calls?……He is waiting with excitement, don’t stand him up!

-From Jesus with Love

Ask “Jesus Do It Through Me”

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This week I found myself at my sisters house with my computer out of commission so unable to do blogs, youtube video and any usual online ministry for the Lord. I had so much time on my hands I wasn’t sure what to do. I knew the Lord wanted me to be about his bushiness as he has instructed me time and time again that my time is now His time. Its a grace given to us all and we will all be held accountable by how we used HIS time for ourselves or for his kingdom.  So lately I have been feeling a nudge to work more on my creative gifts. During the times the Lord had me evangelizing I desired so much to work on music, art, dance etc and even prayed in my heart the Lord would give me more opportunites to work on that. So I was reminded this week when I had all this time that he had answered my prayer, so instead of complaining I should get to work lol

So two nights ago I saw my nephews sketch book and coloring pencils as I thought to myself maybe I should draw. The Lord has given me some beautiful imagery in my alone time to explain things to me and so badly wanted to put them on paper to share it with other but began to think…Lord how, I have no skill in drawing. It seemed like a large task however I remember from Still Small Voice Youtube Ministry the Lord has been teaching us how to trust him with our creative gifts. How we should bank on our inability to do anything and rely on his grace to do everything he put it on our hearts to do. All we have to ask is “Jesus do this through me”. So I took the Holy Spirit up on that offer, sat down with a heavy sigh and said, “Holy Spirit draw through me”. The Lord gave me the word and a picture on my mind and I googled some images and began to trace with my eye the idea I had been given. Within an hour 1/2 I looked back upon the work and was utterly amazed at what Jesus had done! For not having any skill in drawing He did this through me by his grace. I thought to myself if you can do this imagine what else  you can do through me, and I bet Jesus was like you have no idea LOL. I honestly had no idea this gift was inside me and I am now so excited to draw more images with Jesus touch others and encourages others to do the same. Below is a prophetic message from the Lord about us using and relying on him for our gifts. I believe it will encourage you greatly

Prophetic Message From Jesus about our gifts (SSV Ministry):

“My precious Vessels unto Honor, I can do with you anything I want to. If you don’t have the DNA to do it, I will transplant My DNA into your very physical being and you will have the talent necessary. I ask for only two things: a pure love for Me and a willing heart of faith. With these voluntary attributes from you, I can do anything – and much to everyone’s surprise, I often do! You are not limited by past failures and boundaries you could never cross. As a matter of fact, you may not have been able to cross them, because I didn’t feel you were ready – and the gift could have been your undoing.

“Music is an especially treacherous in a gift, because people begin to worship the artist and it can go to their heads very quickly. For this reason, there is much tempering and seasoning and in fact difficult events in the past of my musicians. They must carry the anointing to bring you all into My presence. This is a priestly duty, and not all live a pure and priestly life. That is why you are seeing older musicians raised up. They have lived through the fancies and vanities of the world and have come into a place of realization: only I am important. “I wanted Clare to share this with you so you could understand that you are perfectly fit for any assignment I impart to you. Your skill level is not needed; your heart and surrender are. In fact, I place My desires in your heart.

So I would ask you to look inside and recognize your longings. I have placed them there for a reason. As you discover what lies beneath that throbbing heart, you can bring it to Me to turn it into reality. “I am waiting for some of you to discover yourselves and what I have for you. Seek Me until you find Me and I will give you the desires of your heart. Even as it is written, “Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you.”

“Remember, to bring you joy and fulfillment is truly My delight.”-Jesus

So has he Lord put a dream in your heart to paint, dance, sing, produce, create in anyway for him? Do you feel you don’t have the talent, skill, your not qualified or that its not good enough or the worst lie that many others are doing it , so your not needed. LIES, LIES, LIES. Do you know how unique you are, there is no one like you and the Lord wants to use your vessel which is unique in personality and ways to minister to somebody only YOU can reach. So my friend so what are you waiting for? Those dreams are not yours but, its His dreams embedded in your heart waiting for you to step on faith and rely on his grace and ask  “Jesus do it through me”…..you will be utterly amazed and in awe at what he does!!

-From Jesus With Love

Kenya Mission Trip, Nothing I Expected But Everything I Needed!

 

 

 

 

 

REPENTANCE
“I am going to convict you of your motives this coming week. I am
going to expose attitudes and habits that have hindered you and
prevented you from becoming who you truly are in Me. Some things
may come as a shock to you, when you see why you really do what you
do.
“But this is for your own good. This is to remove more spots from
your wedding gown. This is to bring you to repentance. And if any
think more highly of themselves than they do of others, well, you will
discover just how lowly you are. This is a good thing. For truly I lift up
the humble but decrease the stature of the proud.” – (Rhema Book by Clare Du Bois)

Welp, that sums up my trip pretty much LOL. Truly the Lord sent me all the way to Kenya to do a work in my heart, to think I was going to minister to people but, He used this trip to minister to me. So with that said my Kenya Mission trip was not what I expected and everything I needed. It truly superseded my expectations because it was God’s expectation and his perfect plan and will the whole time!

If I would’ve been honest with myself going to Kenya I had many expectation because the Lord had indeed redirected my attention to this mission trip when it was the last thing on my mind. I had been given a dream from him about 6 months ago where I was in Kenya putting on an event and sharing the gospel with the local village ladies. So I knew sometime in the near future I would be going to Kenya just not now. So upon leaving for the next 10 days I thought I was going to Kenya to make a divine connection in order to put this future event together among many expectations of seeing the blind eyes open, captives set free, miracles, signs and wonders! LOL Oh how I am still learning what true ministry is, just every day loving and serving people.

So I found myself stepping unto Kenyan soil and it felt like home for me. I knew this is exactly where the Lord wants me to be at that very moment. We had gone with the main itinerary  to assist and serve for a 4 days Pastors Conference held at CMM. Whereby over 400 pastors from Kenya and Uganda come to be refreshed, renewed, & equipped for their ministries. Once arriving I realized a life of a missionary isn’t always exciting or followed with signs, wonders and miracles but, I found God’s delight in the lowliest of thing. In sweeping, cleaning, serving, washing dishes, praying for people and just merely serving that brought God glory.

The Negative Motive & Attitudes in My heart the Lord showed me through out the week I had to repent for:

    1. Resisting submission to authority
    2. Seeking approval and affirmation from man
    3. Complaining & ungratefulness
    4. Self- righteous attitudes
    5. Pride
    6. Discontentment
    7. Result based motives
    8. Selfish desires
    9. Critical/ judgmental thoughts

Therefore you can see why the Lord began to reveal these issues in m y heart, its so true the saying the Lord heals in layers. Many of these attitudes I thought I was free from but he showed me how I was resisting authority in my heart as everything I felt the Lord telling me to do was shut down as a precaution being a different country, how I was still seeking mans approval to affirm Gods call upon me and being turned down felt like rejection, how I than began to complain instead of being grateful for the opportunity to serve, how quickly it turned to pride/self righteous/ attitude thinking highly of myself, which led to selfish desires of wanting to be used by God in a “big” way, then eventually turning into critical and judgmental thoughts towards others….sheeesh Did I ever tell you how much of a hotmess I am lol but, its okay because as the Lord once said to me ” I am HIS hotmess” haha and how He loves me just the same. What a merciful, gracious and patience God we serve. So if the Lord can still use me, train me, and love me as I am that what makes you think he cant do that for you my friend! I love Jesus

The week before I left for Kenya the Lord gave me two Rhemas the first was to “seek the lowliest place in everything” and the second was “To be servant of all and least of all”. That is exactly what I learned on this trip that a leader is only as good as how they follow and indeed the lowliest place is the best place to be. It means to seek positions, service in places no one else wants to do or go. To also exalt others and their ministries above your own. I found myself immediately praying for my team members, seeing their virtue and value in the group. I began to have so much joy in serving, helping, cleaning and doing whatever I was asked to do. There was sooo much that happened in Kenya that it couldn’t fit in one post, that’s what Youtube is for 🙂 but, the greatest of it all is that the Lord did a work in my heart and that of all my team member’s in the most amazing way. He removed our mask, revealed our hearts to each other than unified us. To serve people, intercede for Kenya and to sow seeds of his love wherever we went!

THE BEST KENYA MISSION TEAM EVER!!
R-L top to bottom
Samuel, Ben, Pastor Aaron, Alex
Daisy, Lesley, Monica, Melissa, Rachel
ME(Nana) Cindy, Kelly, Rebecca, Jenny

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-From Jesus With Love

 

 

 

 

 

Being Ordained By God

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Matthew 22:14 For many are called, but few are chosen.

I am learning in my walk that its a wonderful grace that’s given to all who are ordained by God. For the longest when the Lord called me I was running for man’s approval, man’s validation, and man’s support of what God had called me to do but when God ordains you He calls the unqualified, the unequipped and the uneducated. Those without status, title, and influence to become a light house in their generation. Fortunately, for me I fit all of those qualification and you do too!

When I began to walk in the direction the Lord called me to I got a lot of opposition. Not only from the enemy but many times from well to do meaning Christians who would question what the Lord told me to do because of my many non-qualifications. I too believed I had to go the “normal route” the way everyone has gone who is called by the Lord but I have come to realize that MY WAY was normal and GODS WAY never is lol.  These are some of the few things I heard and some things I have learned:

The first thing the Lord put on my heart was to start a prayer meeting at my apartment my first year for walking with him. I heard “you don’t have a covering so you shouldn’t do that”….actually I heard there
Psalm 91:4 reassures us, “He shall cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you shall take refuge”
Learned: I am married to Christ so the Holy Spirit is my covering

As the Lord continued to lead me the Holy Spirit began to impart a love in my heart to pray for everyone that I met or encountered. I heard “ you shouldn’t be so quick to pray for everyone or lay hands only be led by the Lord”
Philippians 2:3-4 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.
Learned: God loves everyone and wants to touch everyone through you if you would allow it!

I had many tell me “you need to get a spiritual mother or father to help guide you in this spiritual walk”. So I began searching and the Lord was closing every door.
John 14:26 But the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will help you remember everything that I have told you.
Learned: Although having a spiritual mother and father is good in Gods timing the best counselor is the Holy Spirit who is the best spiritual counselor you can have!

I thought I needed to go to seminary school and others told me that I must if I am called to “ministry” However, when the Lord began to confirm that He would teach me I was scoffed at and called prideful to think that God could teach me.
John 6:44-45 For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up. 45 As it is written in the Scriptures,[a] ‘They will all be taught by God.’ Everyone who listens to the Father and learns from him comes to me.
Learned:
That in fact God loves to teach his children and by the Holy Spirit, He is the best teacher. Furthermore in scripture he even confirms that many of us in these last days would be taught by him

I find myself today unqualified in my own strength but qualified by Gods grace. I find myself unequipped by my own training but equipped by the trials God has allowed. I find myself uneducation without any vocational ministry studies but educated by the Holy Spirit. I find myself without status in the church but in the Kingdom called a “a royal priest”. I find myself without a title but in the Kingdom titled “a warrior bride”. I find myself having no church pulpit but my life being unraveled before the “cloud of witness” as a platform to impact all of eternity!

 

Psalm 32:8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.

 

Yes you….you also are chosen, anointed, appointed and ordained by God in this generation for such a time as this. He will instruct yo and teach you in the way you should go. He will counsel you with his loving eye on you. Stop looking to men and believe what God has said and called you to. So my brother or sister…Go NOW, go into all the world and make Jesus known!

-From Jesus With Love

YOU Are Called To Ministry

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The Lord has been really teaching me on Ministry what that looks like and actually what that means. I hear often people will say oh your called to “ministry” or I am called into “ministry” but, I realize ministry is not just something your called too but, a minister is something that you are.

 Minister:  (verb) 1. attend to the needs of (someone).

As a christian WE ARE ALL CALLED to be ministers of Christ!  Its not about having a title, working in a church, or having a platform but in whatever area and location you are called to be an ambassador of Jesus Christ. I thought when the Lord released me for my job 6 months ago for sure He would open the door to start full time ministry, honestly having no idea what that looked like. However, I have come to understand. That I have always been in full time ministry when I said “yes” to the Lord Jan 1, 2014 His ministry in me stared. The Ministry of reconciliation that is, which all believers are called too.

Reconciliation: (noun) 1. the restoration of friendly relations.

He has been using me to restore many back to friendly relationship with him! You see the Lord spoke to me to apply for a job out the local shelter I had been waiting 6 months to get a clearance from him as to what he wanted me to do. So finally when he spoke I scratched my head a little thinking really Lord you want me to go back to the “market place” as we call it. Back into the corporate america in my heart I spoke I thought I was going to go into ministry and He reminded me “you already are.” At your former job didn’t I use you there to draw many to me, since you have not been working haven’t I been using you to minister to people through your social media platforms, outreach, small group, and evangelism in which my response was….Oooh I see lol.  As he was reminding me that now he wants to send me there to to be His ambassador and minister to people in that capacity.

2 Corinthians 5:19-20
or God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful ministry of reconciliation.
20 So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!”

So as a believer YOU are Called into minister YOU are an ambassador for Christ, YOU are called into the minister of reconciliation. To draw all men your sphere of influence that is given to you back to Jesus Christ.  So are you meeting the needs of those around you? At your job are you being a light, are you providing hope, encouraging words and speaking truth to those who are lost and in desperate need of the Love Jesus. Are you reaching out in your communities,  strangers that you pass by who are in need and even to your own neighbors  are you sharing the love of Christ? My friends no longer see Ministers as those who preach, who teach, who are in the church or just pastors because YOU are a Minister so lets get busy with works of service God has given us all to do!

Ephesians 4:11-12
So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, 12 to equip THE SAINTS for WORKS OF SERVICE, so that the body of Christ may be built up

Perfect Love Cast Out All Fear

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The Lord has been really teaching me about leadership and his love those two things go hand in hand. I went to a our youth ministries leadership conference this past weekend and they had a time where the prophetic ministry at our church gave us at random prophetic words. This has been a difficult week and I asked the Lord if he would give me a word and they did.  The word was that I was surrounded by darkness….(I know right first I was like waa I don’t receive this but wait for it lol). That I was surrounded by darkness feeling pressed on every side but, it was because the darkness was attracted to my light. That I found myself sometimes wondering why do I draw the most interesting people because The Lord has drawn a lot of broken and wounded people around me because he can trust me with them. That I have a gift of relational evangelism and my life would be a testimony for many because of my consistent walk with the Lord. I began to laugh because that is so true and I have noticed that it has become very apparent in this season of my life as I have stepped up in leadership. The Lord continues to remind me that “he has sent me people to love and I shouldn’t turn them away”.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

I have noticed that sometimes in the Body Of Christ unfortunately, we have away of hurting and rejection people out of fear. Sometimes we do it purposefully and sometimes its ignorantly but it all boils down to our lack of love. Everyone is a different levels of freedom in our Christian walk and we can easily talk about that person state under the label of  “being cautious” when it can be gossip saying be careful this person has this spirit, this person has that spirit, this person is struggling with this sin, you don’t want to get to close to them like their a disease or something. Which further caused the person to be rejected again and not walking in any more freedom than they were before. This mentality has broken up many friendships, families, and even churches.Even if the person is indeed is struggling or bound by some spirit we know that are fight is not against flesh and blood so you fight this in the spirit with prayer and with……..LOVE for that person! I have experience this in my own life through church small groups and my own personal experience where I was rejected as well because of Spiritual warfare I was going through. It was so painful to be rejected by my own Christian brothers and sisters who I thought would be the source of encouragement during the most difficult time in walk with the Lord.

Mark 2:13-17
While Jesus was having dinner at Levi’s house, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. 16 When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the sinners and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?”

17On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

You see not once was Jesus moved by all the darkness, demonically bound, and spiritual dead people around him when he walked this earth. So why do we as Christians? Jesus first perfect in his love because He was and is Love! He was so confident in who He was, in Who He served and the power that was with in him. As Christians were called to do the same. It is important to seek God for wisdom in all things but, were called to take authority over spirits of darkness and to be friends to the sinners. We are the light of the world so they will be drawn to our light and that’s okay because that’s when we can impact them with the love and power of Jesus Christ. I love what Jesus said that its not the healthy that needs a doctor but, the sick. So when we see our Christians brothers and sister sick, struggling with a lust of the flesh, or strongholds or even the lost who are sick spiritually they are the ones that need Jesus the most and not to be rejected or outcast because they are not free.

The scripture says the one who fears is not made perfect in love. Wow so as a Christian if we fear we then allow the evil spirits of this world to have more power over us. When the  word of God says greater is in me than who is in the world! So when you find yourself around those who are in darkness that’s a great opportunity to allow your light to shine even brighter rather than being afraid of  being attacked, trusting or even loving them. Most importantly as a leader its important to realize the Lord has called you to bind the wounds of the hurting, to go after the lost and that can only be done with his perfect love. You will never serve perfect people and if you are then your not really serving the Lord lol. So Perfect love cast out all fear. Ask the Lord to perfect your love.

-From Jesus with love