The Year of Being Tilled By The Lord..

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Image result for tilled soil

Job 5:8 
For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.

I remember Jan 1, 2018 the Lord put it on my heart to call all my siblings together because he wanted to speak to us. As all 6 of my siblings responded to the request and came I was so overjoyed. The Lord in fact did speak too each one of my siblings giving them a word for our family for the 2018 year. In our amazement he gave some the exact same vision! The Lord was calling us into deeper intimacy with him as he stated to me ” Allow me to till the soil of your heart, the rain is coming”. I had no idea what that entailed for me, for us as a family. However, 2018 has indeed been a year of being, not only pruned, broken, wounded, crushed and refined by the Lord in ways I had never experienced. I never cried as much as I have until this year as tears became the rain to heal the wounds of my heart so many times. This has been the year of tilling but I cant imagine it wont be my last. I believe every  believer who desires to truly surrender to God has to go through this process. So what is the process of tillage you ask? Let me explain

So it wasnt about a few weeks ago that I decided to look up what tilling the soil really means and what it looks like. I was completely blown away at imagery and comparison to what the Lord desires to do in our hearts and I got it! Why it was so necessary for the Lord to till my heart the way he did. Below are some frequent question that are asked on Google when one is wanting to till their souls. So I wanted to provide a spiritual picture and answer to each question. Why its necessary for the Lord also till the soil of our hearts,

  • What Does Turning the Soil Mean?

Tillage or Turn the soil. That is a directive found in countless garden book and websites. If you are unsure what the phrase means or what it entails, know that you are in for some hard work. In the end, you’ll have a soil bed that is loose, better drained and well suited for plants.

  • So What Does It Mean For The Lord To Toil The Soil of Your Heart?

This too is found in scripture when David cried out “Lord create in me a pure heart” maybe you have prayed that before that is exactly what he is doing. Preparing our hearts to be pure before him. It is indeed HARD WORK many times we wont understand the phases, trials and test at but in the end the Lord is loosing up the hardness of our hearts or areas that are hardened to his spirit. You see he must be able to get our heart better suited for the “seed” that has fallen so when the rain ” Holy Spirit” comes the word is not chocked, the gifts our chocked , the anointing isn’t chocked by pride, selfishness, jealously you name it but the seed bears fruit!

  • What Tool Do You Use To Turn The Soil?

A must-have soil-care tool with a rounded edge. Handy for scooping compost, cutting into hard ground, and digging soil out of planting holes. A squared-off blade takes cutting through sod a snap.

  • What Tool Does The Lord Use To Turn The Soil of Hearts?

The Lord always will use those closest to us as tools of sanctification. You see his desire is that we would “Love until it hurts” that’s how Jesus loved. He wants our heart transformed into his dwelling place where he can love freely and abundantly on those around us. So he will use loved ones, peers, friends to hurt us, betray us, speak against us, reject us so that we may learn to love like Christ. That selfishness and self love in our hearts has to be broken up. We are taught love , honor and respect are earned and to only give these things if you get it back. But that is not how Jesus loves, “Yet while we were still sinners he died for us (Romans 5:8)”. So many times the Lord would ask me Nana, are you wiling to die to flesh for the sake of me?  Would you forgive, let go of all offenses and continue to love them? So many times the Lord allow devastating circumstances, hard situations and times of abandonment from those I thought I needed the most to break my heart….my hard soil.

  • Why Is Loosening The Soil Important?

Air pockets that are created by the deep loosening of soil facilitate air and water penetration for plants to use. Air penetration is also important to the micro-organisms in the soil that perform all kinds of important tasks creating nutrients for the plants (as noted above with cultivation).

  • Why Is Allowing The Lord to Loosen The Soil of Your Heart Important?

Daniel 5:20 “But when his heart was lifted up and his spirit became so proud that he behaved arrogantly, he was deposed from his royal throne and his glory was taken away from him’. His desire is that we wouldn’t continue in the ways of a stubborn heart that doesn’t yield to the Lord in obedience. Behaving arrogantly which in turn will cause us too lose our glory and even our salvation if we allow it. To be used by the Lord as a vessel we need to make room in our hearts for the wind of God (hearing his voice) and the rain, which is Holy Spirit to lead us. That he would take over our hearts and in him we would move and have our being  (Acts 17:28) not in our own hearts. That is so easily moved by our emotions, past experiences, defensive, quick to be guarded and rarely willing to give. Its important so when the Holy Spirits penetrates he is able to perform all kinds of task through us and we are able to cultivate the gifts of the spirit even more. When we allow the Lord to loosen the soil it gives room for him to CREATE!…PURE HEARTS

So at this point you may be asking the Lord when will the tilling stop, when will the crushing, pruning be over Lord? When will the rain come that I may see fruit?

When Can I Plant After Tilling?

You’ll need to wait at least a few weeks before planting, but waiting a few months is better. A thorough tilling once a year typically is enough to keep your garden soil healthy, so pick the time that works best for your gardening schedule.

  • When Will The Season of Tilling Be Over?

Well that one is always up too the Lord. I too kept asking Lord when and began to think as many of us do because the year is changing things will be different tomorrow. However the Lord is outside of time and I have come to find out the seasons of earth don’t run the same as the seasons of heaven. In this question, I have come to find my peace and rest in the Lord. When I stopped complaining, being anxious, wallowing in self pity of being stripped, tried and tested. I now look back and see how very good it was for me and more so how close its drawn too Jesus. I have come to know him in the most intimate way. I now understand the cross with such a love and passion recognizing he calls me to walk in the way of the cross. All the tilling is so that my heart may be healthy and even as painful as it has been its been so rewarding. I also see that soil is used ground that is used the season comes when it has too be tilled again for new seeds to bare new fruit so this wont be my last time.  “Jesus I trust you and welcome you to till the soil of my heart always that I may be ready to not only receive your rain but a dispenser for others to be refreshed and eat of the fruit you produce in me!”

Will you allow him to till the soil of your heart….the rain indeed is coming?

-From Jesus with Love

 

Choosing Jesus Or Choosing Nana: The Fight Of Self-Denial

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tug_of_war_with_god_by_kevron2001-d9rra27

(Pic credits Kevin Carden website http://www.christianphotoshops.com)

I have found to walk with Christ takes two decisions, first confessing with your mouth and believing in your heart that he is Lord which seals your salvation then…..( the part which majority of us believers struggle with) to DENY YOUR FLESH completely in total surrender that He may live. Which I have come to realize is day by day, decision by decision to choose Jesus rather than to choose Nana. I don’t pass the test every time but the longer I am walking with Christ the more apparent that call seems, the quicker I find myself willing to sacrifice my desires for his…Now I didn’t say easier lol Don’t be mistaken it is hard but dying is never easy.

I had given my life to the Lord at a young age but I hadn’t given him my life. So when the Lord called me to surrender my life 3 years ago I hesitatingly did.  Not realizing it would be the greatest, most amazing and difficult decision I had and will ever make. However, I began to get rhemas from the Lord asking for “total surrender” and I would wonder hmmm Lord I have completely surrendered, (or so I thought) I don’t get it.  You have my heart and my life is yours now. Not realizing he wanted complete control of my time, my body, my money, my plans etc….you name it He wants it all. So many times as believers we declare God you can have it all, whatever you want, my life is yours but do we really mean that and are we willing to live a sacrificial, crucified, hedged in life , denying ourselves every worldly pleasure and living only for the perfect will of God?? I would say many Christians don’t , especially in our generation and in our western Christianity.  I remember the Holy Spirit speaking to me these words:

“In this generation we call obedience legalism and holiness religious”

So true! I remember being so frustrated at times because I slowly started noticing as I walked with Jesus there were many things other Christians could do but I couldn’t. For the life of me I couldn’t understand it. I thought the christian life was suppose to be fun with Jesus! lol No, the Lord was like is “your called to be holy and pure for me”. So I have found myself many times making plans, having personal desires and them being completely adverted because Jesus has plans for me as his bride to do instead. So i have been learning to submitted to my bridegroom.

One instance was two days ago, where I found myself weary at my moms house with all my nieces and nephews over. The day felt like I was taking care of a day care lol. I was unable to get any work done really and wanted to get away. Just then a friend from my Kenya team reminded me of  get together they were hosting at their home. Watching the Avengers movie and eating snacks. So having a strong desire to go, I first wanted to make sure it was okay with the Lord first so I asked him for a rhema I got “Sickness” . Now when I get scriptures about that either I am asking for healing or the Lord is saying my mind is sick, I have come in agreement with wrong thinking…hmmm. So having a slight nudge he didn’t want me to go and would rather have me spend time with him. I thought I am not sick (like I didn’t know) and went anyway lol. As soon as I got in front of their house a song came on the radio guess what the Lyrics where ” There is a sickness in the world where people are looking to fill the void but can only be filled with Jesus” All  I could do was laugh, I was like nooooo. Jesus I am already here (the Lord can use anything to talk to us by the way). Then the second song came on lyrics ” Lord help me to listen to what you tell me to do”. I reasoned with the Lord saying, moms house is crowded where can i go to spend time. Then the idea came to mind to go to my sisters place, she was out of town for  trip so would have the place to ourselves. So with my face in my palm, I looked up looking at the inviting house, movie, fellowship and snacks or leave and head to my sisters. I had a decision to make….To Choose Jesus or Choose Nana. Nana, wanted to have escape, have fun and relax with friends and Jesus wanted to escape with me, have fun and have me relax in his heart…… (with a sigh ) lol I said yes, Lord. I chose Jesus (that is all by his grace)

I made my way to my sisters apartment and there I had 3 hours of the most awesome and intimate time with alone in her walking closet. I left feel at peace, no longer burdened, loved and feeling full of purpose. Jesus has called me and if not all of us to a life of TOTAL SURRENDER . We must understand it takes our permission for the Lord to complete His work in us. He is a gentleman, he wont force his will on you but will you yield to his? Jesus has asked me to live a life denying myself of  the news, of movies, of TV, of Entertainment. of certain food, of sweets, idle time wasted hanging out,  many worldly pleasures, worldly comforts and live on the bare necessities which come from him alone just to name a few.  It feels like a tug of war every time but, God is so gracious and patient with me lol. He has me hedged finely and I am learning to appreciate that rather than complain. I get asked many times lately about intimacy with Jesus and I always tell them one of the many components to walking with Jesus so intimately is to deny yourself, not all at once. The Lord works with us all in stages and by layers, its one day at a time waking up to say I choose you Jesus today above my desires, my plans and my comforts so will you  make a decision and choose Jesus every time? Ask him for the grace to make you willing to be made willing!

Matthew 16:24
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.

-From Jesus With Love