Hello Brothers, Sisters, and Heartdwellers family, May we be sensitive to the prompting of the Holy Spirit and the grieving of our spouse Jesus when we neglect him for other things.
I want to apologize for neglecting you, for allowing the cares of this world to pull me away from Your heart and being distracted in my thoughts, and for allowing other things to take up the space in my heart and mind that should be yours. Please forgive me, Jesus.
I had gotten a Rhema message two days ago from Mother Clare’s website titled, “You have neglected me, My brides”. I thought, uh oh, I felt it was so true for me. I have been so busy this week especially in the morning during my prayer time having to help the new priests, being called in the community for other things which have cut my prayer time short, dousing fires that have risen up which have not really permitted me time to get a message because I have to rush off to Mother Clare’s to work. But even on my days off there is no excuse and when I have tried to press in I have been called and find myself irritated by interruptions and in prayer, my mind is all over the place on other things. I have had enough backed-up messages to cover the channel, but I missed Jesus deeply.
When I read the Rhema message surprisingly it was talking about her channel and how donations and views were low and that was going on here on this channel as well, so I thought the message was for the flock and not for me. If I can be honest I was a bit relieved, but I still had a small conviction about it and I brushed it off. I got a chance to spend the weekend in one of the empty hermitages and had a wonderful time with Jesus in worship, but again was called suddenly on my day off during prayer and was unable to hear from the Lord again.
The following day I had scheduled our first board meeting and wanted to get in at least an hour to spend time with the Lord before our meeting because I would have to rush off afterward again to go to Mother Clare’s for our Sunday service.
The first song the Lord played was called “Please come back to me” by Michelle Tumes. These are some of the lyrics:
I can’t breathe, it’s agony
Wondering where you are
Picture me on my knees
Have you run too far?
… Can you hear can you hear
The sound of my heart break
With each step you take?
Can you feel, can you feel me when I say …
“Please come back to me?”
I miss you, will you come to your senses?
Please come back to me
I await the day when I prepare the feast
And I embrace you running to me
… All I am, all I have
Is yours to find
You hide and seek, you think you’re free
Ouch, the lyrics stung my heart as I realized how much I had hurt Jesus and I was moved to contrition that I have been so busy lately and I was the bride who neglected Jesus. I immediately felt I needed to cancel our board meeting and got confirmation, so I canceled it to ensure that I put Jesus first instead.
I sat before the Blessed Sacrament and closed my eyes. I saw Jesus before me looking sad with his head and eyes looking down. I came before him and put my forehead to His forehead and lifted His face. Then I planted kisses all over Him. First, on His forehead, His eyes lids, His cheeks, everywhere saying I was so sorry for neglecting You. Then I held Him tightly putting my arms around His neck then He held me tightly and I could feel Him smiling again as He whispered in my ear, “I have needed you.”
I have needed you too, I said, I am so sorry please help our hearts to be one again, Lord. I am desperately in need of you. Please forgive me for putting other things before our relationship. Help me not do this again.
“I know this is a season of growth for you that I have ordained, and summertime is always filled with many temptations to get busy with distractions, even ministry, and put Me on the back burner. But that cannot be for you, My beloved bride. I know you come into prayer, and you give Me what you can and many times I allow the community interruptions, but there are many more times, where your heart is divided far away from Me, consumed with what needs to be done, what is going wrong and the worries of this world. Keep your gaze and your heart fixed on Me. That is why you’re feeling the burnout.”
Yes, Lord, I feel like I am on the edge. You gave me that Rhema last Sunday, “Burn brightly without Burning out”…how is that possible? What do I need to change? Many times I despise my responsibilities (forgive me Lord), and wonder if I could just have a retreat, a day of just being with you and doing nothing else.
“That time is coming, Beloved, and I will call you into moments of retreat for a day or days at a time, but only if you would give Me your undivided attention and heart each morning it would be like a retreat. That is your time of rest, Beloved and that is your time of healing and equipping. I want you to begin rising earlier, that will help. When you rise earlier it gives Me so much more time with you and you’re not feeling pressed or rushed.”
Lord, but I sleep so late because I get home so late because of my schedule.
“I understand, Beloved, I will give you grace for all of that, but rising earlier will help. I do wake you up, but you lie in bed for at least an hour and that time could’ve been spent with Me instead. I promise you if you cooperate I will give you all that you need to do what it is that I am asking. Burnout comes from a lack of intimate trysting time with Me and for you, hearing My voice. My voice gives you strength that is how we connect and feed one another. Do you know you feed Me, My bride when we speak?”
No, Lord, how so, how can I feed you? You are God you have everything already.
“But I don’t have you, Beloved. You feed My soul with your smile, with your voice, and with your love. My merciful love is alleviated when I am able to pour out the contents of My heart to My bride. You are like a golden pitcher that I can pour My living waters into, and it brings Me relief that you are here, you are listening, and you desire to know what is on My heart. Then I am unburdened, do you understand?”
Yes, Just like when I have a lot on my mind, and I go to confession or talk to a friend I share my burdens. I walk away feeling so relieved, at peace, and knowing someone understands.
“Exactly, My beloved, you are My friend and My bride. Where can I go to unburdened myself when you are not there? I need you —. I need all My brides in this hour. So much suffering, so much disdain for who I am and so many more who are mine are so distracted by the allurements of the world and cares of this life that I am neglected. It happens every summer, so I am pulling all my brides close very close.
My beloved ones, please don’t get pulled away or snagged in prayer. I love that many of you come to spend some time with Me giving me the best you can, but I am desiring more. Please don’t just come for an hour of worship and say a few prayers, be with me as you would be with a spouse or an intimate friend. I want your heart and if you feel coldness and dryness in prayer ask Me to ignite the fire of your heart again to love Me, to feel again and desire me above all else.
Then seek Me out to know what is on My heart. How I desire to share My burdens with all My brides, but many are going to and fro concerned with external things, family, children, life, and their heart are so full that you can’t hear Me speak nor can you catch the impressions I give you in your heart because your mind is elsewhere.
My brides, I need you above all else. Let even ministry come secondary to our time and union together. What good is ministry if you are not connected to Me? If you are not seeking Me out but praying just to check in and say that you have prayed and go on about your day. The times you are living in are treacherous that will not sustain you or be enough for you to avoid the enemy’s traps and tactics he has set up for you each day.
You must give Me more time, immerse yourself in My loving presence and truly seek Me out to get instructions from Me each day so you can stay in my will and be protected and be given a heads up when a trap is laid up for you. In that, you can avoid many unnecessary sufferings. I wait for you, My brides to come back to Me.
For those who have been coming, press in to hear my voice you are mature enough to begin journaling and listening for My voice. Don’t allow the enemy to continue to sow in your minds doubt and unbelief. If you come every day expecting to hear from Me I promise you I will speak, so come.
As for you, My beloved little one, thank you for responding and thank you for putting that important meeting to the side and putting Me first. I will bless it when you all meet and give grace and anointing upon each person to the roles they have been given as they too put Me first in their day and seek Me out. It will be necessary for all of you to really get close to Me, cleave Me, and to be filled with My love to lead this ministry and organization and that will happen in prayer. Tell, them these things.“
Lord, are we on the right track?
“You are on the right track, Beloved. Be determined in all things, but more determined to be with me above all else.“
That was the end of Jesus’ message.
The confirmation that He gave me in Bible Promises was Hosea 14:4, I will bring My people back to Me. I will not hold back My love from them, for I am no longer angry with them.
God bless you, family, until the next message.