Hello, Brothers, Sisters, and Heartdwellers family. May we all realize that in our sufferings we are going from Glory to Glory.
So once I got out of the hospital one of our sisters who lives in Albuquerque was so gracious in allowing me to stay with her because my mother was coming to see me for two days before I headed back up to the mountain to be with the community.
It was the second day that I had been there, and I brought nothing with me besides the clothes on my back. I found myself longing to hear from the Lord. Through this ordeal, I hadn’t received a word from him besides when you told me to fast which was about a week prior. All the Rhemas weren’t really as comforting as I would’ve liked since then. I was getting many corrections as well. I was feeling resentful again, hurt, and feeling My spouse, Jesus so far away.
Thank goodness our sister had some Holy books at her place and decided to get a word from Mother Clare’s book called, “Rhema” which is a book compiled with many messages from Jesus to Mother Clare under specific titles so you can get a word from the Lord. You can find this book on Amazon or even on the website and download it for free http://www.Heartdwellers.org
My first reading was “Seeds of Demons”. Uh oh, the paragraph that out to me was titled, Taken from Spiritual Warfare 19 – How Demons Work, 3 of 3. Dr. Sherry had a phone conversation with Mother Clare and shared how we can get seeds in our hearts. She got frustrated and impatient on a phone call and immediately received seeds of spirits of irritation, frustration, fear, and agitation, in her heart and how important for us to repent 5-6 times a day to keep ourselves clean.
Then another paragraph stuck out to me as a Rhema, and was, Taken from Spiritual Warfare 17.
Mother Clare begins,
So, yesterday when I had my communion service, the readings were from Colossians 3, and they truly brought home everything the Lord has been teaching us about our relationships with others and how easily we get seeds of resentment, with which the enemy builds a stronghold of unforgiveness. I’ve been monitoring myself very carefully and notice I have buttons and hots spots, places where I recoil inside and begin grudging and complaining internally. Although I don’t let it show externally, most of the time, I feel it inside and it takes the joy out of whatever I was doing.
Paul address this very thing in Colossians 3 beginning in verse 12. “Because you are God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with heartfelt mercy, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.”
All I can say, Heartdwellers, is the very moment you offend charity or Holy Spirit, retire to a private place, kneel, and ask God to help you with repentance. I don’t dare undertake anything until I’ve checked my heart for seeds and asked Holy Spirit to please show me what’s there in
These readings cut me to the heart as I could feel pain rise up wondering where my sweet Jesus had been. I have been through such a rough ordeal, and it would be wonderful to get some words of encouragement. But Holy Spirit was right as I realized I needed to humble myself before the Lord. I decided to go to the bathroom and get on my knees before God and I just broke down crying as many flashes of frustration, fear, resentment, and unforgiveness even, towards the Lord were brought up and I just wept in repentance.
Right after getting up, I could hear Jesus begin to speak so I got a piece of paper and began writing,
First pouring out my heart before him.
Good morning Lord, thank you for bringing me to my knees, quite literally. This sickness hit me hard in so many more places and I didn’t understand why you felt so far away or why I was being admonished in many of my Rhemas which caused even more bitterness and resentment. When I got repentance for the um-teenth time I realized I had to take a hard look in your mirror and not mine and the reading you gave me from the Rhema book broke me.
You’re right, I’ve been full of seeds of bitterness. In almost everything, even during my trip to Zambia. I saw how I complained constantly in my heart about everything, put expectations on people, and was disappointed. Furthermore, this trial has even caused me to fear moving forward again in anything. I also realize how merciful you have been towards me. Lord I repent, thank you for giving me the grace of contrition and repentance I asked for. Please heal me, create in me a clean heart, and renew your spirit within me.
“My beloved daughter, I do chastise those I love, and I do love you, very, very much little one. I have suffered with you.” I saw Jesus in tears I thought. Aw Lord. “Every song I played, and Rhema I gave you concerning My passion wasn’t about Me suffering outside of you, but Me suffering with you through this trial and you suffering with Me. This is by far the closest we have been. That is the beauty and gift in suffering.
“Although it is unwanted by many it’s the greatest gift I can give a soul, to be so close to Me. Yes, your enemies thought they got the best of you and have been waiting for an opportune time to attack as I reminded you. You are weakest after your greatest victory, but they fail to realize time and time again with my chosen one, the Lion of the tribe of Judah stands with you.
“I too, lie in wait, watching their move, and seeing their attack. In moments you feel forsaken, they too think you are forsaken by me so they rush in for the kill, if you will, and just at the right moment, I come running. The only roaring Lion scattering them to terror, and they fall for it every time because they have no faith in My words that I spoke to my beloved ones, that I would never leave them nor forsake them (Deuteronomy 31:6) and there is victory every time as I work all thing out for My glory for your good.
“Do not fear my brave and courageous one. That is who you are, as you take my hand and continue to climb higher. Do not fear what is ahead, what is next, or what you will encounter. Keep your eyes on Me. Keep your affection for Me alone, and you will turn back to see one day the glorious trail of fruit behind you and the many souls who follow you, following Me, who made it to the top because you didn’t give up. It is not an easy climb, yet it’s painful at times, but it will continue to be the greatest adventure of your life. You were not created for normal, not at all my dove.” He said that laughing.
As an aside when I first got sick and even when I was in the hospital I kept thinking why can’t I just have a normal Christian life? This is not the first time I have asked him this, so He is addressing that.
“How silly of you to continue to ask Me to give you a normal life. You would be completely depressed and unsatisfied because that is not how you were fashioned. You were created for glory, for destiny, for adventure, for joy eternal. You were created to think and do the impossible and that is exactly what you will do, you and all my brides. I continue to put you on display because you were also created to be an example to many. You are a pioneer and many following you will do greater exploits, being men and women of greater faith than you because they have seen what I did in and through you. It’s all about Me beloved little one not about you.” As He said that smiling.
I live in you, your life is mine now. You are not your own but belong to Me wholeheartedly and I want to live in all souls that freely and you will prepare the way for Me to do so in many souls.
My beloved brides I know for many it has not been easy it seems you step into one season of trial into another season of trial. What you don’t see is that you’re stepping into one season of glory to another season of greater glory. Many of you are shining so beautifully as you are being sanctified and the stains on your wedding garments are getting less and less and the many wrinkles you once had are being ironed out.
Oh, my brides, you are a spectacle to behold, don’t give up in your trials. And I’m afraid to say do not look forward to having trials and suffering stop in the near future rather it shall only increase from this point on. But look for me to endow you with more grace, to be clothed in more of my glory, and to use your life to reach the world and save souls.
You all have consented, you have given me everything and for that I’m grateful. I will take everything with your consent and that is what I’m doing. This world is not your home don’t look to find complete happiness or fulfillment in this life, but I can guarantee, oh my brides your joy will be uncontainable in the next!
Courage is on the way, hope is on the way, strength and respite are on the way to help you for the steep climb ahead. For I long to share my glory and you my brides, are destined to do gloriously.”
That was the end of Jesus’ message.
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God bless you until the next message.