So, I felt the Lord wanted me to share the trial of suffering with you guys. in order to encourage you in your trial of suffering—how you can unite yourself to Jesus and his Passion. Whew, it has not been easy!
So, I came back from Zambia Sunday, May 1st. and immediately I started feeling symptoms. And, uh, I thought maybe it was allergies until we were having our community prayer, and something just hit me and realized I was around a lot of people who had Malaya in Zambia. And the Lord even healed a couple of people with Malaria. I looked up the symptoms I realize I had all the symptoms. So, I immediately began to ask Mother Clare and the group to break the curse of Malaria off of me because something similar happened before when I traveled home and came back. The first time I traveled home I received the curse of COVID, and the Lord had me fast for three days – dry fast. I told Mother Clare and she prayed for me and it broke. That scripture is powerful, “That if anyone sick among you, call for the elders for the prayers if the righteous avail much”
So every time she prays and anoints me it always breaks. This time it was in the case. So I kept shrugging it off — the pain and the symptoms because I knew we had an event coming on Saturday. And it was getting worse and worse. It was really bad. At times I felt like I was burning from the inside out. I was shaky, joint pain, and my chest — so hard to breathe. So I had everyone praying for me. So first two days I was there in Taos, I was knocked out. I couldn’t do anything for the event. The Lord gave me a message about anytime I travel now, I need to do a three-day fast to clean out toxins and to break any curses because I’m always cursed when I go out to do missions or travel.
So I did the three-day fasts as He mentioned, just a liquid fast. And Ruth was so generous and kind, helping me every day in my weakness. And so the third day it actually broke, or so I thought. And, uh, so I began to work to get things ready for event. Then hit me again that evening. I didn’t know what was going on. Well, some days I felt good and other days I felt really bad. The good feeling lasted a couple hours.
So at this point, I knew it was Malaria because the Lord gave me the messages that it was a curse of Malaria. And then I got a Rhema message from Mother Clare’s website about someone close to you betraying your trust. And it hit me, and the Lord said, it was somebody in Zambia who had cursed me, somebody who’s close. My heart dropped thinking , you know, I was really close to Pastor Chama, Pastor Brian, and a couple others. And I met a lot of his family, so I didn’t know where to start. So through my discernment and the Lord revealed to me it was a family member of Pastor Chama who had taken my name or some type of effigy to a witch doctor to curse me with Malaria and the curse of death. I think the root of it is covetousness. There are a lot of people really jealous of Pastor Chama and of his contact with me, to help so many people.
So, with that said, I was really despondent and yet to pay for the person the Lord revealed to me. Without knowing, I think it was Thursday, Elizabeth came down and she said a witch doctor actually astral projected in her room. He was all black with black eyes and had a straw hat and straw skirt and she it told to leave.
And stubbornly, he wouldn’t leave at first, and then she said again to leave. That Friday morning she told me, and that’s when the Lord revealed to me about the curse. So I told her what the Lord had revealed to me — it confirm that. So we’re kind of struck by that — the audacity.
And so we decided for the event — before leaving, Friday night, we would get all the volunteers together and pray because it seemed like, one by one, everybody was losing their voice. One volunteer’s wife was feeling ill when she arrived — her voice was gone. My sister’s voice was gone too, and she was fine the following. So we all laid hands on each other and began to pray. And then one of the intercessors, Rams, said he saw this black fuzzy thing with a parasite attacking my red blood cells. At that point, Malaria wasn’t really confined — not medical-wise. It was confirmed because that’s where Lord told me, so I knew that was the Lord.
So after that, that morning I actually felt great, and I was amazed. I thought the Lord really had healed me again — for a brief time. So the [preparations for the] event were going on great. Then Mother Elizabeth began losing her voice in the morning too and I was like wow, this is really an attack! So she received prayer and she was able to speak. And then finally, towards the end of event, all the pain came rushing on me so hard. I couldn’t even walk. All of the volunteers were trying to encourage me to have faith, and to walk and to speak by faith. I was trying but the pain was so intense.
So I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye everybody. I just hobbled to my sister’s car and asked her to take me home if she could and she did. And that was probably the most intense night. For the most of the week I [had been] feeling very weak, shaky and the burning was more so like in my bones, not feverish. This was the first time I had an outside fever, and I was burning hot. They didn’t even take off my clothes. And my sisters are so nice enough to come and cook soup. But I couldn’t talk with anybody because the pain was so intense. Just know I was tossing and turning and crying out to God for mercy. Until my sister came in and gave some of the soup which helped a lot — and they left.
Then Mother Elizabeth and Ruth came to check on me. And until this time my family did know that I went to Zambia. Um, as you guys heard in the messages, um, the Lord didn’t really them to know because of the witchcraft I’m dealing with in my family. So they ended up telling my siblings and I was like, “Oh no everybody will know”. I was upset at first, but I realize now it was God’s Providence, and He wanted it exposed.
So I was frustrated all around — with the sickness and why the Lord allowed this curse to land. And why now I’m humiliated — thinking — knowing that I lied to them and getting sick on top of it — it looked like a punishment. So you see, that’s what I felt that’s why I felt, the Lord allowing this wasn’t really lovey-dovey like my spouse, Jesus — but more so admonishment and correction. So I knew my suffering — there was a correction in this, I still don’t know where. I came back to the Lord saying, “Please, show me the error of my ways.” He gave me Psalm 78 which is about trying and testing and being ungrateful and how forefathers were struck in the desert because of it. And then He gave me Psalms 119 Teth, which is about going astray — the Lord afflicting us. So, I didn’t know what was going on or why.
So, every time, that whole week, I would ask the Lord, can I go to the hospital, I always got no. And so that Sunday I texted Mother Elizabeth early in the morning and I was like, I can’t do this anymore the pain is excruciating. And she said, the night before that at this point they couldn’t see me suffer this way, they were going to take him to the hospital. I’m so glad she took me. It was excruciating pain. So I went to Urgent Care. They couldn’t handle Malaria. I went to Holy Cross Hospital, I was the first ever Malaria patient, so they could help with the symptoms but not with the actual parasite.
So Malaya is a parasite, it’s not a virus, meaning that this parasite attacks my red blood cells then makes them deformed, and it multiplies and coagulates together, then it keeps attacking the red blood cells. It attacks every organ in your body — kidney, liver, your brain, everything. There are different types of Malaria. I don’t know which one I have, but then it seems so severe. So, when I got to Holy Cross Hospital. The nurse was so kind. He was even inspired that I was his first Malaria patient. But I was just praying the Lord would bring somebody who knew what they were doing because after YouTube things, they even called the CDC — or, no, I think it was University of New Mexico Medical Center or something like that. And realized they couldn’t help me. So I had to be airlifted — uhh —here to Albuquerque Presbyterian Hospital.
When I was airlifted here, I was just in so much pain. I just felt like de-de-lirium, yeah, that’s the word, I felt delirious. They got me on medication the next day — uhh — but the warfare was intense guys. So the first day I got here I was lying in bed, and I was just feeling, you know, delirious my eyes open and closing.
Uh, yeah, I just felt so delirious — confusion.
And then, I guess in the spirit I saw this black figure. It was a demon of course. It looked —uugh — he had spiky hair, sharp teeth — he came up close and it looked as if like there’s a glass plate between us. So at first he walked past me, then he came back and slammed his face on the glass screen and said that “Now the victory is mine.” And when he said that I saw a huge light come in my room, and I realized it was Zeal, and he just sliced this demon in half. It split open and said this.., blaaahh [recoiling in disgust] nasty noise and was gone. Then this huge beast dog came. It was huge, it wasn’t a dog, it was like — I think like a sabretooth tiger, that’s how big it was. And this came running around my bed and they came and attacked Zeal, my guardian Angel. And when they attacked him another Angel came down with the sword and stabbed it right in the middle — of the beast — and he evaporated. And, for the first time I saw my other guardian Angel.
So I then began to be relieved when Zeal told me that the hospitals are the greatest places for spiritual warfare and as I looked up it was like my roof was open and it was demons flying everywhere. Demons flying, hovering — dragons, whatever you want to call it. There were also a lot of angels too. I was surprised at the amount of demons and darkness in the sky hovering over this entire hospital. Then I noticed there were two angels with staffs in the front of my door, as if no one could enter in, bypassing them.
He told me to get up and come with him. So in the spirit I came out of my bed, and I walked with him in the hallway. I was amazed that a lot of nurses, doctors and the workers here had demons accompany them. They’re hissing at me and Zeal — hissing at us — and there were some nurses who had angels with them. He took me to a room, and he told me that the Lord sent me here to minister to people. I was amazed — and then I got a phone call, so I came out of it. I was just in shock, really.
And then that evening I began to feel oppression in my room, and I would hear voices. I know now they were probably witches or souls who were astral projecting into my room. There were a couple of voices and one of the voices said, “Look, that’s her sister”. I came out of it, and I was like, who are they talking about and what does this have to do with my sisters? So felt as if one of my sisters was a target and whoever this person is came and found out that I was here. So, I began to cover and pray for my sisters.
And then, I had sleep paralysis attacks like three different times. Uh, one time the person just came and held my arm and immediately began to seize up, like at seizure, like sleep paralysis and I was released and covered myself with the blood of Jesus. I had two more attacks in the morning — the same thing. I was exhausted and really fearful honestly.
And uhm, the change happened. My first nurse was really nice. Then when the switch happened — they came in at 7 to switch the nurses. I felt eerie about this nurse and that’s when the attacks happened. I told the Lord I plead the blood of Jesus over this room, that anyone who does not have good intensions can’t come in my room. And sure enough, I can’t believe the nurses who were changing shifts never showed up in my room the whole time. So, that was something. But afterwards, um — well then the next day, there was still a lot of pain. I was taking the Malaria treatment tablets and I got attacked again. Someone’s voice came in my room and said hello and I just began to have sleep paralysis. So I got on the line with my intercessory group and really prayed behind me. And that was just for courage because I’m here alone in the hospital — hospital room. And the Lord, he just feels so distant, but I know he’s so close but even the Rhema’s weren’t like my honey-god spouse.