Hey Family, this is Rainbow. I pray that you all are doing well, and Welcome to The channel if we have any newcomers, Yay….
For this Series, I chose the topic “God, the One Who Sees”. I just had to pick this topic because it just resonates with me. Almost all of you have heard my story and how Jesus brought me out from harm’s way into his divine heart where I will make my home forever. Today I want to go just a little bit behind the scenes.
When my dad left, for the majority of my life, I lived in a shanty house in a small village that was considered a ghetto. The word “Ghetto” refers to a part of a city, especially a slum area, occupied by a minority group or groups. When the word “Shanty” is placed before the word house it usually refers to a small rough hut or shack which poor people live in, built from tin, cardboard, or other materials that are not very strong. There were guns, drugs, gangs, and so on. Hmmm — maybe I should go back to the beginning or at least to what I had been told was the beginning..
My grandmother migrated over to our country with her four children from the country Guyana to start a better life. They had to start from ground level to bring themselves up because they were in new territory. But with a lack of academic knowledge, they ended up just living from day to day on what they had. My Mom then fell in love with a Trinidadian man and had 5 kids out of wedlock. 3 out of those 5 are in heaven with Jesus which makes me the eldest. Booo, I hate being the eldest. Their love story unfortunately did not last. When I came into the world the life they lived is what I adapted to — survive daily on what you get. My mother was deprived of an education because she suffered with epilepsy and seizures being forced to depend on my grandmother for a place to stay with us. The only form of income we had was my mother’s monthly disability benefits and my grandmother worked as a housekeeper for the rich. Our house was quite small, and to say the least, falling apart. There were insects and creatures everywhere. We had the worst plumbing situation, and not much to sustain us. Yet the 5 of us, being my grandmother, mother, myself, my sister, and my Uncle lived our lives.
As a child, I thought nothing of this. We had good days, we had bad days. This was normal to me, so I lived normally. But deep down in my heart I always wondered why I was here. As I grew up I got more embarrassed about my living conditions and my poverty. I had so many questions as to why now that I was older with more understanding. I just couldn’t appreciate where I was or my portion because I watched often as my mom would struggle. I saw the worry in her face as she wondered what she was going to feed us; how she was going to get us through school. I saw other kids eat and drink the best when all I had in my lunchbox was bread and water. They had so many things and to me, I had the leftovers of what people chose to give to me. Why God? Why? Tell me why? a question that has been ringing in my ears for so long. Then one day I left where I was, and I got into a state of Comfort where my mind could focus, and God stepped in, and He answered my “Why”. I remember when we had nothing in the cupboard to eat, somehow the next day food was provided. When our groceries were at their lowest we somehow had food for weeks. When we had absolutely nothing to celebrate Christmas, Easter, and other holidays people came and donated food boxes to us sometimes toys and snacks — many times they doubled the food boxes. When our clothes were worn out huge garbage bags of clothes sometimes new would be brought for us by others. Toys would be given to us. Shoes would be given to us. They were second-hand, but My husband always says, “Half of a slice of Bread is better than none at all” A small Shanty home was built for us to stay in as we grew up. My mother couldn’t afford for us to get an education and yet I have an education and I have been through school. Every time my mother was in need. And she sighed deeply in her heart. God provided. God put me through school and got everything I needed. Fed us clothed us and took care of us when we needed it the most.
But this is the Best part! We knew God existed we believed in him, but our hearts were far from him. That did not stop him from moving heaven and earth to take care of us. Many times we ate the leftovers that people would give us and sometimes found toys in the trash to play with. No matter how we served God. He saw us! We were outcasts, no one cared. But the ones that everyone overlooks are the ones God sees. It’s safe to say that God has taken care of me all my life. because my mother could not. It was these simple little blessings that he used that made my childhood a happy one. I mean who doesn’t like getting stuff? All kids do. He could have left us without anything — He could have overlooked us. After all, there are far holier people than worldly filthy people like us. But he didn’t bypass us. Even when we couldn’t see his kindness and we were ungrateful and unappreciative of it, it never stopped him from providing for us. It never stopped him from loving us even when we did not return it and did the complete opposite — continue to Sin. Till this day he is still taking care of me, He never stopped being my Jehovah Jireh, My Provider. Even when I was the prodigal daughter in the pit of my sin he came running. He has never stopped, and I can testify that he won’t stop because he loves us with an everlasting love, and that’s in Jeremiah 31:3.
So I got my ” Why” answered. Everything I have faced in my life leading up to this point was a testimony of God’s Goodness, his faithfulness, and his lovingkindness. It is the reason why Heartdwellers Caribbean exists today. That even though as a kid getting stuff was a joy and luxury to me, now my joy is giving to make others happy as I once was. It is the reason why I can testify that whatever you are going through. Whatever you have found yourself in, if you feel like the outcast then know that God is Adonai El Roi, The God who sees — and he has a plan for your life. Hewritesstraightoncrookedlines,Hemendstheholesandbrokenpiecesinus, He iscallingyoutoknowhisloveandtocomehome—whereyouhaveafamily, where You are loved, where You are cherished, and where you can dwell deeper into the depths of his heart — with God.
It doesn’t matter what Satan Tells you, Honey. He only seeks to kill, Steal, and destroy, and that’s in John 10:10, that’s in the Bible! Don’t entertain a liar whose only agenda is to lie to you. Don’t listen to his lies. When you give your life to Christ he has washed you clean by His blood. You are renewed in Christ, and you are now a royal priesthood, a chosen generation. That’s in the Bible too, 1 Peter 2:9 — a Child of the king. No devil, No demons, no principalities are gonna hold God back from reaching you. You are loved, Redeemed, and Renewed by his blood, Amen?
There is so much more that I have been through and there is so much more that God has done for me. But I hope that my “Why”, even though it be short, answers Your “Why”. I hope it answers your questions. I hope my testimony shows you that God looks at those that the world rejects. Because — He is the God who Sees.