Lisa’s Testimony

December 26, 2021

Hi family, this is Lisa!

I’m sorry. My testimony is so long because I have so much to share about all the good God has done in my life. So, Sister Therese and Sister Jahnavi have really given me courage to share my testimony because in their testimonies they shared a lot of ugly stuff. And the reason it’s taken me so long to share my testimony is because I didn’t want to share the ugly stuff in my life. But listening to their testimonies made me realize how freeing it is to confess our sins to each other and still have your brothers and sister in Christ love you even after seeing all the ugly things in your life. And really it’s the ugly things in your life that make a testimony, because the ugly things show what God has redeemed us from and how beautiful His work is in our lives. And after you confess those things there’s a cleansing that takes place. And I’ve never been to confession, but this will be like my first confession, to all of you! And hopefully Mother Elisha can give me an Absolution. So, God please forgive me for all my sins, and thank you brothers and sisters for your love and prayers for me.

So, I wanted to start with my childhood. I was raised in New Mexico. The sky is what makes New Mexico so beautiful! I feel like God created New Mexico just to show off His sky. The sky looks so big, and the clouds are so puffy and it’s just gorgeous. And in my family we would drive a lot—like an hour at a time, to go to Santa Fe. So, I would be in the car on long car rides listening to Christian artist Twila Paris and admiring God’s sky. And I think the Lord on those long drives would be talking to my little heart while I was sitting in the back seat listening to Twila. And one time I had a very clear thought. The Lord was speaking to me, and He said, “What if I come back before you give your life to Me?” And I was like, “HHHHuuu… [gasp] Oh, no! Don’t come back yet Jesus!” And I asked my mom to pray with me and I accepted Jesus into my heart. And then I felt so relieved because I thought Jesus might come back before I finished the prayer [laugh]! Which was so funny.

I loved Jesus! I feel like all my life from the time I was a child, I loved Jesus. But that being said, I was misguided. I had a lot of flaws and sins that I was unaware of, because we’re all born sinful and selfish. And you know children can be selfish. So, I feel like one of my biggest sins as a child was having a self-righteous attitude. I thought myself better than everyone else and I liked pointing out what other people were doing wrong. And it’s funny seeing my kids now—they do the same. They’re always telling each other what they’re doing wrong and I’m always telling them, “Worry about yourself. It doesn’t matter what other people do; you just have to make sure you’re doing the right thing.” And I guess they get that from me. So, I didn’t realize how wrong that was when I was little.

I was also an introvert, and I was shy—not like terribly shy, but I had trouble making friends. The one good friend I had moved away, and I wasn’t told. Just one day she just wasn’t at school anymore, and I never saw her again until years later in high school. It was a miracle of God. She came up to me at a track and field event we were having with another school. She said, “Hey are you my friend Lisa from Kindergarten?” I couldn’t believe it! God knew how much it hurt my little heart to lose my best friend—my best and only friend—and He planned that just for me, because He cares about the little things. Thank you God.

So, in elementary school I would daydream a lot. And because of the daydreaming I wasn’t good in school because I wasn’t paying attention and I was lazy too. So that was a problem and I actually got held back a grade, which was super embarrassing and humbling. And it was painful too because when you get held back a grade you lose all your friends and that was difficult. As a child I loved Jesus very much, but I was like a little kid in a kitchen trying to help daddy bake but I was making more of a mess than I was helping. And that’s kind of how I was. I loved God and I wanted to help Him, but I wasn’t doing the right things.

So then in Middle School and High School I started to get really vain. I would spend a ridiculous amount of time on my hair, and I was very boy crazy. My life was focused on finding a cute boy who would fall in love with me and adore me. And I feel like a lot of that was due to movies I had watched, like Disney movies, where they really emphasize romance and finding your true love. I didn’t realize that true love is something you need to wait for, and it’s something you need to pray for too. You don’t want to give your heart away to the wrong person, you want to wait for the person God has in mind for you. And when you wait for the person God has for you, then it’s such a blessing. So, thank God, by His mercy I didn’t marry the wrong person.

But I had two boyfriends in High School, and I realize now that I was not a good girlfriend to either of them because I was very needy for affection, and I was very manipulative to get that affection. But despite my mistakes, God used those relationships to sanctify me and grow me. I feel like I got out a lot of my flaws in those two relationships and they prepared me for marriage to my real husband. So, I’m not saying it’s good to date, but God still used it for my sanctification, because at the end of those two relationships, I started to realize, a little bit, how selfish I was and how I hadn’t really treated them very well.

So, I finished High School and then I had to decide what I was going to do with my life—and I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. The ideal thoughts in my mind were like, “I want to marry a Christian man and we’ll go off together to be missionaries in the Amazon!” Or something like that, LOL [Laugh]. So that was in my heart, and amazingly God kind of worked it out but not at all like I expected. So, I was thinking, “What career could I use to be a missionary? Oh, well, nursing! Nurses help other people out and they take care of people in poor countries.” And it just seemed like a really great idea to me. My idea of nurses was kind people who take care of people and encourage them. So, I went off to nursing school—and that was a big mistake. My mom told me not to—she was like, “I’m not sure this is your gift.” But I didn’t listen to her. Sorry mom!

So yeah, it didn’t go well. The material was so incredibly difficult, and I did not understand anything. God has made our bodies so amazing and so complex and the stuff you have to know for nursing about all the different parts of your body and how they intricately work, was too difficult for me. Trying to learn all the material, I just didn’t even know what we were talking about. Plus, you know how I told you in elementary school I would daydream and not pay attention? I was like that in college too.

So, I did two years of nursing school and then at one point my mom came to visit me, and she took me to Disney Land. If any of you know what it’s like standing in a Disney Land line, it can easily be like an hour long wait to get on a ride. So, on one of those long waits we had a really good healthy conversation and I started to realize that nursing was not for me. But I didn’t really know what to do then. And I was still kind of in denial thinking I could do it.

So that school year went by and then it was the summertime and my mom suggested that I go and work at a camp called Mount Hermon in Northern California where the big Redwood trees are. It’s so incredibly beautiful there. It’s a Christian Conference Center, and I worked in the cafeteria as a waiter for one summer. And that was really nice. It’s such a peaceful environment where you can really meet with God. But I still had the same problems of being vain and being boy crazy. But through all of that God still loved me so much. He was so patient and understanding with me and He understood that what I was really searching for was Jesus’ love. And mentally I understood that nothing can fill the void in your heart except Jesus, but I had never personally experienced Jesus’ love. Instead, I was seeking after empty worldly love.

So, one time, at Mount Hermon, I was sitting alone talking to the Lord and I told Him that I didn’t want to do nursing school, and that honestly, what I really wanted was just to marry a good Christian man and have a family. I told the Lord, “Do You think You could bring me my future husband? And, if it’s not too much trouble, could you do it sooner than later?” That’s what I told Him [laugh]. And I kid you not, that week my future husband called me. He was a guy I had known earlier but we had never had a relationship because I was dating a different guy at the time. So, he called me, just out of the blue that week, and told me that he loved me, and he asked me if I would date him, and I was like, “Oh yes, I would love to!!!” We only dated for like three months and it was a long-distance relationship—then he asked me to marry him. I was like, “Thank you God this is just what I wanted!” So, we got married.

It turned out that he was the perfect person that God wanted me to marry. It’s funny because the perfect person that God wants you to marry isn’t necessarily your ideal person. Rather God puts people together in marriage for their sanctification. And my husband was the perfect person to sanctify me, and I was actually the perfect person to sanctify him. My husband is a chemist, and he has a very scientific mind. He’s very neat and organized, and he’s unemotional [laugh]. I’m like the opposite of all of that—I’m disorganized and very spontaneous and I was very needy for his affection. And so, our different strengths and weaknesses balanced each other out so that we had to be patient with each other. And God has really used us to sanctify each other. Looking back, I can see how my husband was the perfect person for me.

So once we got married we had kids and let me tell you—I thought I was a nice person—before I had kids. And then after I had kids I realized what a sinner I was. I was like, “Oh my goodness, I am an angry person! I don’t know how to be patient at all.” And I just realized that I was actually not a very good person, because kids just take so much patience and they’re just so ridiculous. I remember my toddler, who was old enough to know better, got into the cat food and emptied the bag out and scattered it all over the kitchen. It was bad and it took me a long time to clean up. And I got upset with him and told him, “Don’t you ever do this again!” Literally, the next day he did it again and emptied the whole bag of cat food all over the kitchen again. And I was just in disbelief, like, “Oh my goodness Lord, what am I supposed to do?” So, nothing grows you in patience and sanctification like kids do. They are a fast track to sanctification. Getting up at all hours of the night with a newborn. God, thank you for helping me through those baby years. I couldn’t have done it without Your help.

I wanted to share about God’s mercy over my first pregnancy. When I was delivering I got preeclampsia and it was a life-threatening situation. My parents were driving from New Mexico to Missouri to come see the new baby, and they hit a deer. Now, Mother Clare has taught us about Simon’s Cross—how when bad things happen—oftentimes God is taking our sufferings and turning them into graces for another soul. That’s how I feel like it was in this situation. My parents were not seriously injured from the accident, but it was a big ordeal getting their car fixed and everything. But I feel like God turned their suffering that night into grace to save my life and my baby’s life. My delivery with my third baby was life threatening too. I was due and they had broken my water, but then my contractions stopped. When the doctor went to check the baby, she said I needed to have an emergency C-section, immediately! As they were carting me down to the operating room my mind was in a panic, and I tried to remember if I had known anyone who had had a C-section before and very clearly my husband’s mom came to mind. She had had a C-section with her twins, and I had this reassuring feeling that if she could do it and everything was ok with her then everything would be alright with me too. And it was. She was probably praying for me from Heaven. Life threatening serious situations really grow your trust in the Lord. Although at this point I had not given much thought to God’s faithfulness and how grateful I should be to Him. Lord forgive me for all the times I’ve failed to thank You for so many things big and small.

So, moving on to my marriage it went well in the beginning because we were both starry eyed, in love. But then my bad character traits of being overly needy for his affection started to come out. And I was also manipulative to get that affection—and also, very vain, of course. So, we just started having more arguments and it started getting more and more difficult. And I started getting more and more hurt. My husband loved me very much, but I wanted him to love me in the way that I wanted to be loved. I didn’t let him be the person God made him to be.

So, one day the breaking point came over a very little argument. And it wasn’t the argument, it was the fact that he didn’t care about how I felt. And in that moment I came to the realization that my husband was not going to fill this void in my heart. It was a breaking moment from God. In that moment I just released him. I realized that he was not the solution to what I needed. From that moment forward I stopped putting any sort of demand on my husband. I was so extremely hurt, and I didn’t know what to do.

Looking back, I really feel like someone had been praying a long time for me, and probably Blessed Mother had been praying for me too. And that moment was the
point when all of the prayers came to fruition. That was the turning point in my life—that one little argument.

So, I didn’t know what to do, but the Holy Spirit had put it on my mind to start listening to the audio Bible. And I decided to start listening to the section from Romans to Jude because I was not familiar with that section. As I listened I wouldn’t even be paying attention; I would just put it on and fall asleep listening to it for the sake of comfort. I just needed comfort, and I didn’t know how to get it. I listened to that section three times in the span of two or three weeks and as I was listening it was like I was being washed. That’s how it felt like—listening to God’s Word is like being washed. I felt like my spirit was being washed, my soul was being washed. And I just started to heal. And by the third time I listened to it I actually started paying attention to what it was saying. I started to revive, and that was the beginning of getting on fire for God!

So, after I listened to that section three times over, two things really stood out to me. First, was how many times it said not to judge others. It says that so many times and I realized how judgmental I was of other people. And I mentioned that earlier, how I was self-righteous and liked correcting other people. So, after listening to the Bible, I made a strong resolution in my heart not to say or think anything judgmental about anyone else. And God gave me a special grace to carry out that resolution, though not quite perfectly I might add, lest I fall into pride. But it was a significant improvement! Thank you God for rescuing me from that ugly attitude. And you know what the Bible says, “Mercy triumphs over judgement.”

Also, I watched some Mary K. Baxter testimonies of when the Lord showed her Hell and that really put some much-needed holy fear in me. Up until then I had been taught the “grease grace gospel” of once saved always saved. Repentance and perseverance in our faith was not taught. My church had reassured me that all my sins had been covered by Jesus’ blood. But the reality was, I had repented for hardly anything in years, and whenever I had an argument with my husband I would only apologize to him if he apologized first, and even then I wouldn’t accept his apology unless it was to my satisfaction.

In those earlier days I remember the first time I got really drunk. I probably had alcohol poisoning I was so drunk, and I remember I saw a bunch of shadowy figures with their arms outstretched towards me. I realize now that they were demons. They were trying to grab me, but some force kept them at bay. I really believe I could have died and gone to Hell that night, but God’s mercy saved me. Now Protestants would say, if you walk away from God then you were never really saved in the first place. But that can’t buy that. I know that I know that little me was saved that day when I asked Jesus into my heart. I had His Holy Spirit telling me not to watch certain bad shows, and not to do certain things but I willfully chose to go against my conscience and do what I wanted to do. Not only that but I had corrupted myself with inappropriate sexual fantasies as well as masturbation. Which is embarrassing to say, but now you can see and understand all that Jesus has saved me from. And as the Lord began turning my life around He slowly started bringing up these sins and other sins one at a time and having me repent for them. And I repented in earnest! I repented for things I had never even considered to be sins before, such as gluttony and complaining. I did a lot of complaining, and you wouldn’t believe how much junk food I could eat. And the Lord in His mercy sent me a cross of having to go gluten free because of health issues. He knew that I didn’t have enough self-control to overcome this vice and this cross was His provision for me. Going gluten free cut out the majority of my favorite foods. So, we mustn’t complain when God allows difficult things in our lives. He works all things out for our good and for our sanctification. This is easier said than done though, but God has loving pity on us, knowing our frames that we are but dust. And He has given me this Rhema many times when I have fallen. But yeah, repentance is so important. It is the beginning of following Jesus.

So, continuing on, the second thing that really stood out to me when I listened to the Bible was how much it talks about the gifts of the Holy Spirit and in particular the gift of tongues—it mentions it quite a bit. I was really surprised because I had never personally heard anyone speak in tongues or any of this stuff. But it was in God’s word. So, I told the Lord, “If this is real, would you please give me the gift of tongues.” So, I continued to ask for that and then my curiosity led me to videos on YouTube about speaking in tongues and I listened to this pastor who said, “Speaking in tongues is speaking gibberish with the faith that it is not gibberish; it is in fact the Holy Spirit speaking through you. It takes faith.”

[Part 2]

And that really clicked with me. And I was like, “Oh, ok. Let me give it a try. I’m just going to say gibberish, like whatever comes out of my mouth.” And this other
lady taught that you need to pray, “Holy Spirit, please pray through me.” And then start speaking anything that is not in your native language.

So, I did that, and a word came out of my mouth. And people, I am not Hispanic! I could not for the life of me roll my “R’s”. But this word that came out of my mouth had a rolled R in it and I rolled it perfectly. And despite this mob of demons that were trying to tell me that I hadn’t spoken in tongues, I knew that the Holy Spirit had just spoken through me, because I have never been able to roll my “R’s”.

And that was the only word I was given but I decided to just keep repeating that word over and over again throughout the next three days. When you try to pray in tongues for the first time you just get assailed with so many doubts because the enemy does not want you praying in tongues. It is so powerful! So. thank God He gave me that tiny miracle of suddenly being able to roll my “R’s” to build my faith. And also, when you first pray in tongues you don’t recognize the words and so you’re very unsure of yourself. But I just kept praying it anyway. And I thought to myself, maybe this is the one word God wants me to pray, and this is all He wants me to pray right now.

And then one night it was just me and God because my husband was out of town on business. And I started listening to a lady who was teaching about tongues, and I was practicing. And slowly some new sounds were coming out of my mouth. Then all of a sudden I just got BAPTISED IN THE HOLY SPIRIT! It was so crazy! The Holy Spirit came on me so hard. I could feel the weight of the Holy Spirit on my head, and He gently pushed my head down and I got hot from the top of my head all the way down to my feet. Just really hot. And tongues just came pouring out of me. My mouth could barely keep up with how fast the words were flowing out of me. And the fire of the Holy Spirit was all over me. This overwhelming, loving feeling came over me. And finally, the void in my heart was filled to overflowing. It was so tangible, and I never felt so loved I all of my life This was what I had been searching for, Jesus’ love. And in my mind I was thinking, “What is happening? This is crazy!” But it was so much fun at the same time! And I prayed in tongues like that for like an hour. And then being so naive and not really knowing what to do I just went to bed after that [laugh], which I later regretted. I should have stayed up with the Lord all night because it was such a special moment with the Lord. It was an Ebenezer altar of remembrance of a mighty act of God in my life that no one can ever take away from me. I was like, “Oh my goodness, God exists, He hears me, He cares about me, He loves me, this is for real!” But yeah, I wish I had stayed with the Lord longer that night.

So, after I started getting on fire for the Lord, then I started to get these attack dreams, which was weird because, up until then, I dreamed very seldom. But now, I was having so many bad dreams with evil stuff happening. Because of this the Lord taught me a lot about discerning what dreams are from Him and what dreams are not from Him. When I first started having these dreams I didn’t think much of them because I didn’t know that God can speak to us through our dreams. I mean I know He spoke to Pharaoh and King Nebuchadnezzar through dreams, but me? That didn’t even occur to me until one night when I dreamed that my friend was in the hospital and me and some other friends brought her cupcakes. That was my dream. And the next day a friend called me up and said, “Hey our other friend is in the hospital and we’re going to visit her. Would you like to come with us?” And I was like, “Sure!” So, my friends came to pick me up to go to the hospital and when I got in their car my other friend said, “Hey I got some cupcake for her.” And I was like, “WHAT?!!! I just dreamed about this!!!” So that was when I started paying more attention to my dreams and writing them down.

So then, this is really interesting. One night I had a very vivid dream where I was being shown a map and things were being pointed out to me on the map. Cool things! But then all of a sudden I heard a voice say, “Not every dream is from the Lord!” And immediately I was pulled out of the dream and sat straight up in bed. And it really felt like someone pulled me out of the dream. So, then I realized that discernment is needed when it comes to dreams, because not every dream is from the Lord. So, it was really merciful of the Lord to give me that guidance from Him so that I wouldn’t just go along with any dream I had.

So, I was on fire for the Lord, but I was still like that kid in the kitchen trying to help Daddy bake and making more of a mess. But I wanted to say, sometimes you think people have a religious spirit because they are so adamant about religious stuff, but actually they are on fire for the Lord, they’re just pointed in the wrong direction. God still loves them dearly because they’re His children even though they’re making a mess of things. And maybe they do have a religious spirit. I know I did, and the Lord had to deliver me from it. But Jesus did say He would rather us be hot than lukewarm. So, if you come across people like that, please think of younger me and be patient and forgive and pray for them. Thank you, God for whoever was praying for me. Some of the fruit of the Holy Spirit is docility and being easily entreated. I’m still working towards those goals, but I trust God to accomplish it in me.

So yes, I did have a religious spirit, but the Lord used this to break me from pride, which because of my self-righteousness I didn’t even know that I was prideful. Jesus doesn’t like goats butting the sheep. And that’s what I did one night when I went to Bible study at my church. I felt adamant about something, and before you knew it, I got everyone arguing about it and stirred up contention in the whole group. On the way home I had a really bad feeling in my gut. I felt like I was standing up for the Lord, but I couldn’t shake this bad feeling. So, when I got home I immediately went and prayed about it and clearly heard the Lord tell me that He was not pleased with how I had acted. Then I just felt so embarrassed I wanted to crawl under a rock. That was the beginning of my deliverance from pride and self righteousness. Still working on those, but God’s brought me a long way. Thank you Lord! And thank you to everyone who had to be patient with me.

So, the Lord was growing me. But my growth really took off when, by God’s grace, I stumbled across the Still Small Voice channel on YouTube. God really started getting me pointed in the right direction, and started slowly, gently addressing the sins in my life. So, over the next few years I went through many breakings, and trials because that’s what God uses to make His diamonds! I am really grateful for the Still Small Voice channel.

So, backing up in my testimony, I want to tell you guys about a physical healing from God. When I was fourteen I got an auto-immune disease called Wegner’s Granulomatosis. It can affect your sinuses, lungs, and kidneys but I only had it in my sinuses, so they called it Limited Wegner’s. I was sick for a whole year, but God took care of me. I had peace through all of it and that was actually the first time I listened to the audio Bible because I was lying in bed all day and didn’t have much to do. But that was really a blessing and in the end the elders of our church prayed over me and the medication they treated me with was effective and my disease went into remission. Praise God!

But the doctors warned me that I might have a relapse and that’s what ended up happening except that this time the disease manifested itself differently so that I didn’t recognize that it was my auto-immune disease. I had pain all over my body, but it came on very gradually over the course of seven years. So, before we had kids I worked at a house cleaning company called The Maids which was also very good for my sanctification. So, you know how I was very self-righteous? Well, a bunch of Hispanic women worked at The Maids and let me tell you, you can’t out work them. They would work so fast, so well, and so efficiently I would always fall behind. And that was a big hit to my pride because I realized I was the person on the team dragging everyone down. They would finish their work and have to come and help me out on mine. So, thank you Lord for humbling me in that way.

So back to my auto-immune disease, I was cleaning a sink one time with The Maids, and I realized just how much pain my hands were in, and I was wondering if it was normal. So, the pain came on gradually and I started getting really tired too. And I didn’t mention my pain to anyone because I wanted to offer the suffering to the Lord, but then it got to a point where I was having trouble functioning and even walking. I was very tired and mentally foggy, and my lungs started spasming and making me cough. So, at that point I told my husband, and I went to Patient First and they did an x-ray and found a mass in my lung and sent me to the emergency room.

And I didn’t know what was wrong with me, at first. I was like, “Oh no I have cancer!” But no, it turned out it was all my auto-immune disease. And that was such an ordeal because we had trouble getting a Rheumatologist Specialist to treat my rare disease. And backing up, before I told my husband and I was still in so much pain, I had really gotten to the end of myself and I told the Lord, “I can’t go any further and I just want to go to Heaven, but I can’t do that because I have my family to take care of.” And He gave me numerous Rhemas about healing, but I couldn’t understand how that could happen and my faith was hanging by a thread. But He faithfully brought me through all this and by a miracle we were able to see a Rheumatologist. Because, guys, you don’t understand, every Rheumatologist I called said they couldn’t see me until three months out. And I was like, “Three months out? I’m going to be dead by then.” But God faithfully provided. I ended up seeing not just any Rheumatologist, he was the head of the whole Rheumatology department. And so, I was able to get the treatment that I needed, and I started the healing process. Thank you Jesus!

So now I’m doing quite well, but I had to share that testimony because it’s in those worst storms of our lives that God shows Himself most faithful. And that trial really built my faith and trust in Him. And I was like, “Lord, I am sorry for having so little faith in You, because You told me you were going to heal me, and I didn’t really believe You.” And it’s like, “Wow God! Thank You! You are such a good Father!”

So that’s sort of the end of my testimony but there’s a few more things I need to add. So back when I first got on fire for the Lord, Jesus really responded back to me. You know how the Bible says, draw near to the Lord and He’ll draw near to you. That’s how it was. I started drawing near to Him and He started manifesting Himself to me. So, for example, besides dreams I don’t see things in the Spirit, but I do feel things in the Spirit. Which is so cool! And I was really weirded out by it at first. I don’t know if it was the Lord, or my guardian angel or Blessed Mother, but I would feel someone come and put their hand on my back or kiss me on my forehead. And I could feel the Lord’s presence like that all throughout the day. And it started to be so comforting. Like King David said, “I saw the Lord always at my right hand.” Only it was like, “I felt the Lord always at my right hand.” [laugh]. And that gift has stayed with me to this day and whenever I’m discouraged or even when I’m just resting on my bed, He’ll come and touch me, and I know that He’s there and that He cares and that He wants to talk to me and encourage me. So, I also feel like Blessed Mother comes and touches me on the check too!

The Holy Spirit

Which leads to my testimony about Blessed Mother, which I can’t leave out. So, on the Still Small Voice channel, God gave Mother Clare the wisdom not to introduce us right away to Blessed Mother Mary, Jesus’ mother because the majority of the audience were Protestants. And I’m really glad the Lord did it that way because the religious spirit in me would not have allowed me to be receptive to Blessed Mother at that time. It took time to build trust. And after several years of really beautiful teachings that led all of us into deeper intimacy with the Lord that trust was established. Then, at the right time, the Lord introduced His mother to us which really separated the wheat from the tares. I was unsure what to think of it at first. Mother Clare started us on praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet which only has one Hail Mary prayer in it. I had been taught that praying to Mary was idol worship, and yet I trusted Mother Clare. I didn’t know what to do, so I would pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet and skip over the Hail Mary prayer.

Then Mother Clare introduced us to the Rosary prayer, and I realized I was going to make a solid decision. In fact, everyone on the channel would have to make a decision. But God had already laid the groundwork in me to receive His mother into my heart. I decided I would at least give it a try, so one night I listened to a video on YouTube called, “The Rosary for Beginners” which prayed the Sorrowful Mysteries. I was just blown away. It wasn’t idolatry at all. Rather it was a deep meditation on Christ’s sufferings as He went to Calvary for us. As I listened I could literally feel the anointing, and it moved me to tears. I knew that it was definitely from the Lord, and I asked Blessed Mother to come into my heart and guide me in pleasing her son, Jesus.

Several days later Blessed Mother delivered me from a deep depression I had been going through at that time. I was lying in my bed crying and all of a sudden I was flooded with peace and the heavy oppression lifted. It was incredible. I got up and started praying the Rosary again and this time I reflected on all that Mary suffered in giving up her son to die for the sins of the world. I was a mother, and I had my babies at this time, and I suddenly realized that Jesus was her baby. Mary gave up her son, her baby to suffer in such a horrendous and humiliating way. My heart broke for her, and the Lady Mary’s presence came all around me and she walked me through our Lord’s passion and allowed me to feel her sorrow. Her heart was truly pierced for our sake, because of the death of her Son. And I just started telling Mary how sorry I was for my sins that had led her Son to the cross for me. I told her how sorry I was for her suffering. I was gushing tears as I felt her pain. And that was when God dedicated me to His mother. After this meditation I got the Rhema, “There are wonders stored up in Heaven for you.” I had no more doubts about Blessed Mother.

Mother Clare went on to teach us more about Mary and her role in our lives. She taught us that we were not praying to Mary, rather we were asking her to come along side us and pray for us in the same way you would ask your mom or a good friend to pray for you. She taught us that Christ’s body was not divided. God’s people in Heaven and God’s people on Earth are one body of believers and that the people in Heaven pray for us just as we pray for each other down here on Earth. Mother Clare said that we do not come from a single parent home. Jesus gave His mother to be the mother of all Christians. She loves us very much and her desire is not to get glory for herself, but to bring lost souls to her Son Jesus.

Mother Clare went on to explain how the Rosary prayer is straight out of scripture. The beginning part, “Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee,” is Gabriel’s angelic greeting to Mary which is written in the Bible. And the next part, “Blessed are thou among women,” was how her cousin Elizabeth addressed her in the Bible. And Mother Clare also taught us about the incredible History of the Rosary and how it started. It was given in the 13th century to St Dominic and those who prayed the Rosary were spared the Black Plague which many were dying from at that time.

So, I wanted to share with you guys my testimony concerning Blessed Mother because after I started praying the Rosary Blessed Mother really started helping me get my sin nature under control. Back then I really struggled with anger and losing my temper with my kids. I still have trouble with that, but I have grown so much in patience since I started praying the Rosary.

Also, I wanted to share with you guys, one cool thing that happened back when I first started getting on fire for the Lord is I started seeing numbers. I didn’t really know what numbers meant but as a child I had been taught that 7 was the number of completion and I always felt like 7 was God’s number and 6 was Satan’s number. And when I got on fire for the Lord, I started seeing the clock end in seven. Every time I looked at the clock it would end in seven to the point that I couldn’t help but notice and wonder what it meant. Then I started seeing other numbers like 111, and 222, and 333, and 444, and 555. And I learned later that 1 is the number of God the Father, 2 is Jesus’ number, 3 is the number of the Holy Spirit, 4 is Blessed Mother’s number, and 555 five means suffering because of the 15 secret tortures Christ endured and it also means triple grace to get through suffering. And for me 11,11 is my Rapture number. I also started seeing 89 everywhere and that’s my Birthday year. So, whenever I saw 89 I felt like the Lord was just saying, “I love you!” I don’t know if that happens with you guys, but yeah, it was cool! So, God was using this to speak to me.

I know my testimony is so long, but I feel led to share two pieces of marriage advice because I’ve been through the school of hard knocks when it comes to marriage. My first piece of advice is, don’t let the kids divide you. It should be you and your spouse vs. the kids. So, for example, my son comes to me, and he wants something, and I don’t think it’s a good idea, but Daddy overhears the conversation and Daddy says, “Yeah you can do that.” Then because my husband said it’s ok, I will yield my wishes to his and say, “Yeah you can do that, daddy said it’s ok.” And vice versa the kid might want something and come to daddy. And daddy might think it’s ok, but he’ll ask me first what I think, and I’ll tell him, “This sneaky kid already came to me, and I told him no.” So, then my husband will honor my wishes over what the kid wants and tell our son that he can’t have what he wants.” So, this brings protection in our marriage because the mutual respect between us builds love and trust and unifies us in our marriage. The only time you shouldn’t yield to each other like this is if you feel that it is something sinful. But then you would want to loving talk to your spouse about your concerns in private and not dishonor your partner in front of the kids.

My other piece of advice for marriage is, let them be who God made them to be. Don’t try to manipulate them into being who you want them to be. Don’t try to fix them. Don’t try to change them. Don’t try to sanctify them. Lol. That’s God’s work. Your job is just to love them and pray for them. It’s the love that people respond to. People don’t respond to nagging. That just turns them off. So let them be who God made them to be and you do your best to be a Christ like servant to them.

In fact, I had a dream once about a race. And in this race instead of everyone trying to be first everyone was jumping backwards and trying to be last. Be the last of all, and the servant of all. That is the example our Lord set for us. Love your spouse even with their flaws and be gentle like a lamb. If a dog bites a lamb the lamb doesn’t bite it back. In the same way the Lord has called us to be sheep. Not goats that butt people. So, this is my marriage advice.

The Lord has really turned my life around. Finally, the void in my heart had been filled with His love! And not only that but He’s given me a purpose and a destiny in Christ. He gave me the gift of art, and me and Holy Spirit made many beautiful paintings together, which you have been seeing in this slideshow. If you would like to see, I’ll put a link to my Pinterest channel in the comments below. He also had me join Mother’s Elisha’s prayer intercessory team. The Lord is so good to those who seek Him. And so patient with us too. Thank you Jesus!

On a different topic, I am going to make another video about tongues because the Lord gave me an awesome dream about tongues……

(See Lisa’s message entitled “Lisa’s Dream: Tongues, Super-powers!” which is the teaching that she refers to above.)

Be blessed….

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From Jesus With Love

My Name Is Mary Elisha I started this blog 6 years ago on my journey walking with Jesus and never knew all that he had in store for me. It has been a journey of tears, trust and confidence in him. Knowing that He is my loving spouse and he wouldn't lead me astray however he has given many suprises along the way! lol Upon fully surrendering my life to Jesus, he has completely turn my world right side up. Filled me with his spirit and showed himself in supernatural ways. He has completely left me in awe leaving me with the thought.....(as most Holy Spirit filled followers of Christ also say) why didn't I surrender 15 years ago! lol. When I started this blog I was a 30 years old zealous for the Lord and desiring to make his love known because it tranformed my life. However, I didn't know the way and the road in which he would take me. It is the way of the cross, the way of holiness and the way of love. Living a life seperated from the world and compltely concecrated to him. I no longer belong to myself, but to him as he has led me to a life of hiddeness and deep intimacy I didn't know was so avalialble for all who would make their lives, their hearts his home. He has given me a new name, a renewed purpose and a heavenly family who is so very present and so real to me. Saints who cheer me on, give me council and pray for me everyday to ensure I do the Lords will and the greatest gift of all He has led me to his Mother! Who has always been My Mother just never knew it. I love Mother Mary, she is my heart, my friend and confidant and continues to prepare me to a worthy bride to her son, Jesus. It is she, who has handpicked me for this mission and to run the community "City of God: Sacred Heart Refuge" in Ghana, West Africa. This is her mission and her ministry as a gift to Jesus and I just get to be her handmaiden. Heartdwellers Ghana is an extention of Heartdwellers ministry by Mother Clare and Father Ezekiel from Still Small Voice Channel. Jesus has taught us about divine intimacy with him. As we dwell in his heart, He and the Father come to make their home within us. (John Where Jesus is all of heaven is as well because the kingom of God is within. So here may you come to get fresh manna from Jesus and any ther saints who may want to give us council, encouragment and exhortation that we may finish this race of faith and run to win the prize. To be a bride spotless, blameless adorened with purity, carying the fire of charity and zeal for our fathers glory. That we maybe ready for him when He comes back for us. Our Lord, Jesus Christ is amazing the intimate you become with him the more in awe he leaves you. I hope this blog draws you nearer to our Lord and you began to open the ears and the eyes of your heart to all that he has to say to you and show you. All of these messages are from Jesus with you. May you be blessed by his words of life. God bless you!

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