Hello, brothers and sisters and Heartdwellers family. May you receive the grace to do whatever the Lord tells you.
For the past week, I found myself still struggling with the demands of the Lord and my responsibilities. During the Lord’s Supper, two days in a row, I got the same reading— twice—about how our forefathers tested the Lord with their grumbling and complaining.
1 Corinthians 10:9-12
“We should not test Christ, as some of them did—and were killed by snakes. And do not grumble, as some of them did—and were killed by the destroying angel. These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the culmination of the ages has come. So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!“
Ouch! The Lord was really making it clear that my murmuring and complaining was displeasing him. I had been on a wheel of self-pity, and it wasn’t until I told Mother Clare, hoping to get some empathy as I usually do, but this time the Lord, through her, call me out and called me to rise up. As she said, “It’s time for you to put your big girl britches on. The water is only going to get colder, deeper and the current is gonna get faster, you have to swim, or you will drown. So, you need to put a demand on the Lord for the anointing every morning to do all that he is asking you to do.” I thought wow, that was straightforward and frank. But it rose something up in me. As I wiped my tears and thought, she is right, it’s not going to get any easier. I can whine about this, and nothing changes or put this big girl britches on and get going. [Laugh] It may sound silly but that morning when I put on my full armor of God after putting on my Chasity Belt, I asked the Lord for my big-girl-britches. I put a demand on Him to anoint them. That if he wanted me to carry all that he is asking for me to do He needed to anoint these. Then I put it on. Would you know for the past few days I have been sailing on the Lord’s anointing feeling it for sure as I have such a focus and vigor to get things done and meet with whatever challenges come my way?
So, in prayer, I came before the Lord truly repentant and contrite for my shameful attitude.
Good morning, Lord. Thank you for your great mercy towards me. I am so sorry for my murmuring, complaining, and comparing myself to others, and my bad attitude these past days. It was rather appealing how quickly I can forget to count my blessings but rather grow resentful of the cross, the fire you have given me to purify me and to draw me closer to you.
My misery truly is ever before you Lord. And in your amazing grace, you never allow me to feel shame for too long to run from you, but to run to you even when I am under correction. And that is a grace within itself. Thank you, Lord.
And I heard Our Mother of Mercy responded instead,
“You are welcoming, My beloved daughter. These are graces that I have obtained for you through My intercession.”
Blessed Mother, thank you for your motherly care and love. Thank you so much! There have to be times even when you must be disappointed with me?
“My beloved little one, I will never be angry with you or surprised at your weaknesses. Because of the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, I perceive your reaction to every cross and correction and I always make provision that you will come back to Jesus using My ladder, the Rosary. You see every time the group gets together to pray the Rosary, graces aren’t only released for your prayer intentions, but so many graces and anointings are lavished on each of you, for the tests, trials, and temptations that you will face that day and even the ones you have fallen into. God’s graces wash over you, giving you much courage to continue on climbing steadily this mountain of perfection in holiness. That is why the Rosary is powerful and I am so pleased when you all come together and pray it.”
And here she began to address Joey, our new brother in the community staying with us. He opened up to me that he struggles to pray the Rosary with us because his mind it all over the place and he feels ashamed of that and thought it would be better not to join us at all because of it.
Our Mother of Mercy continues,
“Tell My beloved son, that I know his weakness, I know the state of his body and the attacks against his mind, and I don’t judge him for any of it, nor does the Lord. What we look at is his heart and as long as he is willing and trying, tell him to come, enter into my presence during the Rosary prayer, and do not shy away from it. For although he struggles to pray, it doesn’t stop me from praying for him and the angels ministering to him while you all are praying the Rosary. Many angels are there surrounding each of you moving on your behalf and that of the prayer intentions you mention that the Lord’s Will would be done in each one.”
“Now concerning what is on your heart, little one. Come here and receive your Mother’s hug.”
I then saw Blessed Mother sitting and I was at her feet, kneeling and she grabbed me and rested my head on her heart. Then she looked at me and placed her hand on my heart and said, “peace be still” and kissed me on my forehead.
“All will be well with Derrick; the Lord has chosen to lead you in this way of great humility and abjection. Thank him for it instead”.
As an aside here family, after laying Derrick at the altar the Lord has now presented him back to me. It has been a rollercoaster ride, hasn’t it? I got a Rhema that said, “Your marriage is under attack. Stop what you’re doing. Be honest. Pray and spend intimate time together.” Now Jesus and I were having a really rough morning, really rough as the enemy was lying against his character. I was able to fight my way through it and thought for sure the Rhema was about my beloved spouse. After receiving him in Communion, however, he brought up marriage again and revealed that the Rhema was about Derrick. My heart skipped a beat because I didn’t want to go there again and thought maybe I discerned wrong. I reached out to Mother Clare to get discernment and she told me to call him right away. I resisted in disobedience and in fear as she told me that evening the Lord gave her obedience and something was going on with Derrick, I needed to call him right away.
I was hesitant thinking; I have been here before, Lord. What could change this time? He doesn’t take anything seriously I say to him to heart. Oh Lord, I don’t want to face rejection again. My heart can’t take it. These were my thoughts.
Then the Lord played a song by Casting Crowns for the first time called “Here I Go Again,” and the lyrics were so telling. I knew I had to call him and bear my heart with him, but I felt that something was about to happen to him if he didn’t respond to the Lord’s call and had to warn him as well.
After speaking to him I found he was about to make a life decision with many things and one of them was to move to a different country within a few months which is outside of the Lord’s will. The following morning after speaking to him I felt I had done my part as I told the Lord he needs to now fight this battle I have nothing left. I then heard Blessed Mother say, “You continue to tell him that he is about to make the biggest mistake of his life. But you are about to miss out on the biggest blessing of your life if you don’t plead with him.” Plead with him? I thought, wait a minute Mother, you can’t be serious. Plead with him and she said, “Yes, I needed to plead with him.” Can I say humbling or better yet humiliating. I asked her to soften my heart where it has been forever hardened with this trial that I may sincerely plead with him. And she did, so I did.
Our Mother of Mercy continued,
“You just do whatever He tells you, Beloved little one. Not one word of his from your mouth will return void. That song chosen today was very telling. No longer dance around the truth. He must know the gravity of fearing the Lord, walking in his will, and despising the world and all that comes with it. Speak to him boldly, but gently in love. You were right to think that he is not only missing out on the greatest blessing on his life, but you will too if he doesn’t respond. Tuck that way deep in your heart. Although you do not realize it and your heart has been shaken very much in this battle and relationship the Lord will restore the sincere love you once truly felt, but it will be much purer and not full of self-love. Trust Him beloved one. His time is coming to a near end and the Lord’s judgments are upon his heels. Make him to see that the Lord judgments are His Mercy towards us and not condemnation, but it is coming. Pray fervently for him the next few weeks and continue to have great hope and trust in the Lord. This is indeed the year of the Prodigals returning home. Joey was a sign to confirm that, and Derrick will soon follow. Do not fear the Lord’s justice upon him. Just as you have seen the Lord’s justice upon your life, it has purified you, led you to repentance and drawn you much closer to Him, so will it be the same for him.”
And there she is referencing Derrick.
Mother, would you also help me attain the grace to fulfill my motherly role with diligence without complaint and great sensitively to the souls entrusted to me?
“Yes, my beloved, I will obtain for you the grace my little one. Correspond and work with the Holy Spirit more and more and you will face each challenge with ease.”
Mother, do you have a word for your children?
Our Mother of Mercy responded,
“My beautiful doves, the world continues to increasingly get darker. Do not be phased by what you haven’t seen on the news or go looking for it. But many things are upon you—upon this nation—as some things begin to unfold seemingly overnight. Please stay with Jesus, do not lose sight of the cross when he asks much of you because he is suffering so much and so many souls continue to perish. Remember to pray the Rosary daily for these intentions for the lost and those unprepared for death and ask for the graces of courage, gratitude, and great hope for you will need it in the coming days. As things begin to unfold, so many will begin to grow hopeless, and you carry the oil of intimacy with Jesus. Many will need to keep their lamps burning and not give in to despair. Please, My beloved ones, whatever He asks of you, whatever sacrifice whatever cross he gives you to carry, say “Yes.” And then come to me to strengthen you, equip you to carry it with great joy and trust in the Lord.
“That is all for now my beautiful little ones. Go in peace I am with you and do not worry, your prayers have been heard.”
That was the end of Our Mother Of Mercy’s message.
So, with the help of Blessed Mother, let’s give Jesus everything, no matter how painful, how sacrificial, how little, how great, and how humiliating it may be. Let’s say, “Yes, #AllForSouls!”
God bless you, family until the next message.