I made up my mind that I would get up every morning @ 5:00am before work to spend time with the Lord. Now how long have I been consistent about that’s…..another story lol However, I had been going through some tough resistance from the enemy manifesting in anxiety, worry, doubt, condemnation you could name it but woke up late. Darn it thanks for hitting the alarm Nana! lol Jumping out of bed all discombobulated and having only 45 minutes I knew that I needed to press in no matter this day. I came into our secret place ( my closet) worship and my alone time with the Lord now feeling a little uneasy honestly with just a lot on my mind. Lately it seem I had not been able to really connect deeply with him especially during worship. I sat there with my lips singing the songs but, with my mind thinking of how uncomfortable the way I was sitting, how he probably thinks my breath wasn’t so fresh because I had just got up out didn’t brush my teeth, that maybe I didn’t smell so great because I hadn’t taken a shower yet, then mad at myself because I wasn’t even focusing on him at all. Which got me thinking maybe I should’ve taken a shower, read my bible then worshiped. Oooh or maybe I should’ve not worship and go right to prayer because I didn’t have enough time. Yes, All of these thoughts running through my mind as I am singing. I felt like Pricilla Shirer in the movie ” War Room” .The scene where she is setting up her closet as a “War Room” trying to getting comfortable figuring out which way to sit, what chair, how to pray, what to read just getting all worked up for nothing as she was trying to get right in his presence . Lol
Then finally a break through I got the most beautiful impression in my heart, as I was worshipping I saw my little niece Naomi, who is cutest bow legged one year old walking towards me in a dirty diaper and bib. As she is taking her first few steps reaching out for me and I was reaching out my hands to grab her. Then the Lord shared with me, You see how your heart flutters in anticipation to grab her as she reaches out for even when she looks dirty. That’s how I see you, that’s how I see all my children. I long for you and love you right where you are just come to me. The more dirty and uncomfortable you feel that is even the more reason I want to hold you and clean you up with my Love. So come to me don’t let anything ever stop you from coming to me. Then I saw myself as child with a beautiful white dress with ruffles with my arms around my heavenly father neck and my head resting on his shoulder. I burst into tears, with my heart completely melted and the heaviness completely lifted because of the consuming Love of our amazing father.
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord
I began to think to myself how so many others have come to feel they are not good enough to go before the presence of God. That they are not spiritual enough, they’ve been away from God too long so he has to be mad at them. They feel so dirty physically or spiritually because of where they are, what they have done and where they have been. As they carry condemnation and guilt where ever they go. Or, that there is a specific place and posture you have to get too to come into his presence and talk to him. Yet, God sees each and every single one of us as his beloved children. Dirty before him but when we set our gaze on him and began to take steps toward his direction. His heart explodes with Love and anticipation every time. Like we cant even imagine, as he’s been patiently waiting so long for this moment for us to come back to him. So we can be refreshed, cleaned up, made whole and loved on in his presence. So come to him right where you are he longs to pick you up and hold you in his arms!